If you’ll recall, when Microsoft announced that it was opening its retail stores near Apple’s, we noted the possibility of an Arrested Development-style battle, wherein neighboring businesses compete with one another using increasingly ridiculous stunts (banana suits, barely-clad women, jet packs.) But the Ballmer/Jobs competition also has a touch of Arrested Development’s Bluth/Sitwell battles, wherein the Sitwell family (like the Bluths, they’re in the real estate business) lure away Bluth offspring to work for their firm. In particular, mistaking him for talent, they hire ne’er do well Bluth son G.O.B., whom they then fire after he pushes an apartment complex for singles that iss originally entitled “Single City,” but that slowly gets pitched up to a sexual free-for-all entitled “Fuck Mountain.” (It proved that he’s an “ideas man,” G.O.B. later explains.)Well, there’s no Fuck Mountain yet, but Microsoft is swooping in and hiring away Apple’s store managers, offering them big pay-raises. (Note that Microsoft has already been muscling up.) To make things worse for Team Jobs, Apple store workers at Alderwood Mall are alleging federal and state labor law violations and threatening a walkout. How can management appease these unruly proles? Two words: Fuck Mountain.
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