As we’ve noted previously, Microsoft and Apple seem set to relive sitcom Arrested Development’s banana wars, wherein brothers G.O.B. and Michael Bluth–running competing banana stands set up right next to each other, as many such Apple and M’soft stores will be–resorted to increasingly desperate gimmicks in order to move product. Among the tools of the trade: Strippers, a banana suit, and a jet pack. Of course, it’s not the managers who do this stuff, but their charges. Enter Microsoft’s announcement that it’s NOW HIRING for the position of “Retail Technical Advisor”–the equivalent of an Apple Store’s “Genius”–at its new retail stores (logo by Simon!) The war for tech store supremacy needs cannon fodder, and if you “love technology and teaching and helping others” then this might be just the job for you, soldier.