…They’re looking to get alcohol for a party. (In this joke, as in my dreams, the Liquor Control Board doesn’t exist.)”What’ll it be?” asks the bartender.”I think we should get a keg so people can re-use their cups and not be wasteful,” says Sims.”I think we should get camouflage cans of Miller High Life so thatthey blend into the background and don’t spoil the views,” says Nickels.”Ithink we should get pints of Schlitz in steel cans,” says Gregoire. Thebartender tells her that steel cans are 1950s technology.”I’d like a giant steel vat of grain alcohol with housing and a food court and a laser tag courseunderneath it!” shouts a deliriously drunk Frank Chopp, who wasn’treally invited but has deep pockets. Several years pass…Simstwitters. Gregoire plays Big Buck Hunter. Nickelsghostrides the whip on the SLUT. America elects a black president. Finally, because Nickels generally gets what he wants, the groupsettles on the camo cans, which have since gone up in price. But thecamo cans have to be ordered, the bartender says. “So you guys’ll haveto settle for a keg in the meantime.””Keg’s on me,” says Ron.”How do you want to pay for the camo cans?” the bartender asks.Gregoire and Nickels look at one another, and then to Frank, who’s passed out in the corner. Happy tunnel.
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