Thus the seagull-chick affair comes to an end, fortunately a less brutal one than was visited upon the seagull-chicks themselves. If you’ll recall, a couple of state troopers, charged with getting rid of a troublesome seagull nest next to the ferry docks downtown, clubbed the baby seagulls to death. (Standard procedure would be instead to call in the feds, who have roving death panels (that phrase will likely earn us a few clicks from angry, deluded health care protesters. “What’s all this talk about seagulls?”).) Today, the King County Prosecutor’s office announced that it will not be filing charges for animal cruelty or unlawful taking of protected fish or wildlife charges, though it commented that the troopers used poor judgment. A couple of idle young whippersnappers were overheard suggesting the troopers try Alka-Seltzer next time instead.
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