Attention shoplifters: an inability to hold her head up without help is

Attention shoplifters: an inability to hold her head up without help is a surefire sign that your accomplice isn’t up to the job.Enjoying a wee nip of beer from time to time doesn’t make you a bad father. Neither does using your child as a prop to attract or distract a person’s attention, as any single father whose ever gone to a public park in the summertime will tell you.Use your infant daughter to help hide the cache of beer you’ve just lifted from a grocery store, however, and a representative from Child Protective Services will likely show up at your doorstep. The future addition to CPS’ roster of clients in question is 2224-year-old Michael James Chandler. The Bremerton man was arrested over the weekend after he allegedly placed a quantity of beer inside the stroller containing his 2-month-old and attempted to leave without paying.Both the suspect and baby were stopped by the store manager before they made it out the front entrance. When the father again tried to leave, the manager held on to the stroller. In the ensuing tug-of-war, it fell on its side, touching off a Coen Brothers level of poor baby stewardship. Apparently panicked, the father tried to run away. Realizing that he’d left something, namely his infant daughter, our father-of-the-year candidate doubled back, then punched the manager in the face. And while those two wrestled each other on the grocery store linoleum, two men who had accompanied the suspect rushed into the store, grabbed the baby, then fled in a black Chevrolet.Following the botched robbery, they deposited the baby back with her mother, who confirmed that the suspect was indeed the baby’s father. He was eventually arrested pending charges of second-degree robbery.


Talk to us

Please share your story tips by emailing editor@seattleweekly.com.

More in News & Comment

American Medical Response (AMR) organized a parade of first responders to show appreciation for St. Elizabeth Hospital staff April 30. Photo by Ray Miller-Still/Sound Publishing
The complications of counting COVID deaths in Washington

State relies on results of tests and death certificates in calculating the daily toll of the disease.

Puget Sound renters will need housing assistance

Nonprofits, activists are expecting greater need as workers are laid off.

Republicans file lawsuit over Inslee’s emergency: ‘Facts, and the science, are clear’

Lawsuit says state has violated Constitutional rights of citizens.

The Regional Homelessness Authority was created by agreement in December 2019. Pictured: King County Executive Dow Constantine shakes hands with Seattle Mayor Jenny Durkan. Courtesy photo
Regional homelessness authority takes first step amid COVID-19

The authority held its first meeting on Thursday.

Among the candidates for Washington state governor in 2020: (Top row, L-R): Omari Tahir Garrett, Winston Wilkes, Thor Amundson, Cameron Vessey, Martin ‘Iceman’ Wheeler, Ryan Ryals; (middle row L-R): Liz Hallock, Goodspaceguy, Gov. Jay Inslee, Don Rivers, Gene Hart; (bottom row L-R): Phil Fortunato, Tim Eyman, Alex Tsimerman, Cairo D’Almeida, Cregan Newhouse, Raul Garcia.
GOP gubernatorial hopefuls aim to oust Inslee amid COVID-19

Former Bothell mayor Joshua Freed and initiative-pusher Tim Eyman could be the front-runners.

Nonprofit launches new online COVID-19 local resource hub for King County

Hub collects links for more than 300 local resources for people affected by virus.

Sound Transit to get $166.3 million federal grant for COVID-19 response

Funds for operating costs, maintenance, disinfecting vehicles and keeping drivers safe

Don’t avoid the emergency department in a crisis

ED volumes across the state are falling, but that doesn’t mean people aren’t getting sick or hurt.

Most Read