The only cure for an irresponsible night out is an irresponsible breakfast.

December 3, 2012 12:00 am
The greatest, and perhaps only, cruelty of brunch is choosing between the salty and the sweet. It's a false dichotomy at Fig in Santa Monica, California. Consider their bacon waffle, which features bacon in the batter, a scoop of ice cream and a sprinkling of caramelized bacon on top of everything.
The greatest, and perhaps only, cruelty of brunch is choosing between the salty and the sweet. It's a false dichotomy at Fig in Santa Monica, California. Consider their bacon waffle, which features bacon in the batter, a scoop of ice cream and a sprinkling of caramelized bacon on top of everything.

The only cure for an irresponsible night out is an irresponsible breakfast. A good brunch, fueled by caffeine and alcohol, the savory and the sweet, blurs the line between hangover and day-drunk, and makes time stop, at least until 3 pm. Here are the most delicious, calorie-laden, and potentially heart-stopping brunches for a Sunday with nowhere better to be.Published on February 14, 2012

Brunch doesn't have to be just fatty. There are always vegetables at the Bloody Mary buffet at Deck 84, Delray, Florida.

Brunch doesn’t have to be just fatty. There are always vegetables at the Bloody Mary buffet at Deck 84, Delray, Florida.

Carb load with buttermilk pancakes, mixed berry compote, and banana walnut and cinnamon apple sauces from City Hall, Miami, Florida.

Carb load with buttermilk pancakes, mixed berry compote, and banana walnut and cinnamon apple sauces from City Hall, Miami, Florida.

Don't think about how you're going to feel walking out of Boogaloos in San Francisco, California. Just think about you good you're going to feel eating their plate of chorizo hash, poached eggs, hollandaise sauce and avocado.

Don’t think about how you’re going to feel walking out of Boogaloos in San Francisco, California. Just think about you good you’re going to feel eating their plate of chorizo hash, poached eggs, hollandaise sauce and avocado.

If this brunch-style hot brown sandwich, featuring four slices of toast, chunks of house-cured turkey, a cheddar gravy and bacon from Jelly of Denver, Colorado can't cure your hangover, nothing can.

If this brunch-style hot brown sandwich, featuring four slices of toast, chunks of house-cured turkey, a cheddar gravy and bacon from Jelly of Denver, Colorado can’t cure your hangover, nothing can.

Decadence can be classy, like this pain perdu, a.k.a. French toast, with strawberries and basil. served at Ramos House Cafe in San Juan Capistrano, California.

Decadence can be classy, like this pain perdu, a.k.a. French toast, with strawberries and basil. served at Ramos House Cafe in San Juan Capistrano, California.

This Dutch pancake from Fort Defiance in Brooklyn, New York arrives in a piping-hot cast-iron pan, topped with warm blueberry compote, maple syrup and a dusting of powdered sugar. Sure, it's dessert for breakfast, but who's judging at brunch?

This Dutch pancake from Fort Defiance in Brooklyn, New York arrives in a piping-hot cast-iron pan, topped with warm blueberry compote, maple syrup and a dusting of powdered sugar. Sure, it’s dessert for breakfast, but who’s judging at brunch?

Say goodbye to your hangover and hello to the tater tot casserole, featuring baked beef and cheddar at Zayda Buddy's Pizza in Seattle, Washington.

Say goodbye to your hangover and hello to the tater tot casserole, featuring baked beef and cheddar at Zayda Buddy’s Pizza in Seattle, Washington.

For a sugar rush to go with a caffeine buzz, consider this blackberry French toast with brioche bread and mascarpone from Half and Half in St. Louis, Missouri.

For a sugar rush to go with a caffeine buzz, consider this blackberry French toast with brioche bread and mascarpone from Half and Half in St. Louis, Missouri.

Vitamins, protein, morning buzz: Bloody Mary with shrimp at The Breakers Palm Beach in Palm Beach, Florida.A

Vitamins, protein, morning buzz: Bloody Mary with shrimp at The Breakers Palm Beach in Palm Beach, Florida.A

Spicy, sweet, and savory sweet potato pancakes topped with praline and bacon crumble and Kentucky bourbon whiskey sauce served up by Perk Eatery in Scottsdale, Arizona.

Spicy, sweet, and savory sweet potato pancakes topped with praline and bacon crumble and Kentucky bourbon whiskey sauce served up by Perk Eatery in Scottsdale, Arizona.

Sausage and cheddar, eggs and bread plus chopped chives equals a great start to the day at Maeve's Cafe in Minneapolis, Minnesota.

Sausage and cheddar, eggs and bread plus chopped chives equals a great start to the day at Maeve’s Cafe in Minneapolis, Minnesota.

Say good morning to two poached eggs over spicy barbecue pork hash at the Nickel Diner in Los Angeles, California.

Say good morning to two poached eggs over spicy barbecue pork hash at the Nickel Diner in Los Angeles, California.

What is a breakfast croissant without a fried egg on top? Not a breakfast sandwich Down House in Houston, Texas would serve.

What is a breakfast croissant without a fried egg on top? Not a breakfast sandwich Down House in Houston, Texas would serve.