Pack your knives and let’s go on a retrospective tour of Top

By Archive Imports • November 8, 2012 12:00 am
Foo Fighters drummer Taylor sums up a bad, bad pumpkin parfait: No more barfaits.
Foo Fighters drummer Taylor sums up a bad, bad pumpkin parfait: No more barfaits.

Pack your knives and let’s go on a retrospective tour of Top Chef’s delicious history with Top Shit, a weekly feature honoring the Seattle season of our favorite show ever. Got something to say? Contact the Brulee Snitch at flambethis@outlook.comPublished on November 7, 2012

Paula Deen: When Season 8's Antonia doesn't make a dish for the cameras (Hear that? That's the 4th wall crashing down!), Deen scolded: I could come over there, put you over my knee, and whip your cute little ass.

Paula Deen: When Season 8’s Antonia doesn’t make a dish for the cameras (Hear that? That’s the 4th wall crashing down!), Deen scolded: I could come over there, put you over my knee, and whip your cute little ass.

Season 8's cheftestants failed at dim sum service. And the diners let them know it.

Season 8’s cheftestants failed at dim sum service. And the diners let them know it.

Pack your knives and let's go on a retrospective tour of Top

Season 8’s cheftestants failed at dim sum service. And the diners let them know it.

Jimmy Fallon. Perhaps the only judge who acted like giving somebody the ax was harder on him (I'm gonna have to really go out and have a couple drinks after this) than the contestant. He did have some sage advice: Taste your food. Did you write that one down?

Jimmy Fallon. Perhaps the only judge who acted like giving somebody the ax was harder on him (I’m gonna have to really go out and have a couple drinks after this) than the contestant. He did have some sage advice: Taste your food. Did you write that one down?

Joe Jonas. Why? Because having a Jonas brother around + giving kids sugar = ...

Joe Jonas. Why? Because having a Jonas brother around + giving kids sugar = …

...this precious face.

…this precious face.

Season 1's dessert challenge at a San Francisco fetish store gave us Madame X and...

Season 1’s dessert challenge at a San Francisco fetish store gave us Madame X and…

RuPaul: Aren't all desserts really sexy? I mean, have you ever seen a fat person eat a cream puff?...that's like watching somebody have sex.

RuPaul: Aren’t all desserts really sexy? I mean, have you ever seen a fat person eat a cream puff?…that’s like watching somebody have sex.

Penn and Teller may take the whole deconstruction fad a little too far: If we were told to make dressing explode it would really explode...but it would also kill you.

Penn and Teller may take the whole deconstruction fad a little too far: If we were told to make dressing explode it would really explode…but it would also kill you.

The best part of PeeWee Herman as judge was watching the chefs huff and puff and bike their way around San Antonio before bringing PeeWee dinner at ... where else? The Alamo.

The best part of PeeWee Herman as judge was watching the chefs huff and puff and bike their way around San Antonio before bringing PeeWee dinner at … where else? The Alamo.

Debi Mazar: I just feel like the dish was prepared by somebody who hasn't had as much sex as he really needs to to make a dish feel like you really want to fuck. This quotation transcends context.

Debi Mazar: I just feel like the dish was prepared by somebody who hasn’t had as much sex as he really needs to to make a dish feel like you really want to fuck. This quotation transcends context.