Contrary to the old cliché that weed destroys your libido, savoring a few tokes of cannabis with your lover(s) can be just the thing to send you into outer space during your next romp.
Halloween may have passed, but it’s still #scorpioseason, which means everything is a little freakier than usual. Getting high and getting down is nothing new, but for the purposes of this article, I thought I should refer to a professional. I spoke with Ambrosia Bardos, a sex worker who includes weed in their sessions, about how cannabis can enhance a person’s sexual experience. Bardos has had the opportunity to be with a variety of different genders, body types, and ages, and has found that people can have a broad range of responses to weed.
“Gender identity (or age, or body type) has less to do with it than your relationship with your own body,” Bardos said. “The more willing you are to experience pleasure, the more heightened that experience will be. If you have a lot of blockages to pleasure, that stuff will come up first.” The most common benefits people enjoy are heightened sensory experience, a greater feeling of connection with their partner, lower performance anxiety, and an inclination to move more slowly and savor touch and pleasure. “And best of all, bigger and better orgasms,” said Bardos with a huge grin. “We’re talking the ‘all over every fiber of your body’ orgasms.”
Personally, I like a nice joint of something grown outdoors with a high CBD content. You get the flavors of the Northwest wilderness, and the high CBD offers a fantastic body high, while not getting you so stoned that you just check out. For Bardos, it’s all about the indicas. “Gooberry, Cherry Sherbet, Granddaddy Purple … something grown with love, that really gets you into your body, but isn’t super-heavy. Some indicas just make us tired, and heady sativas can pull us out of the moment with overthinking (and sometimes just kill the sensuality entirely).” But you should definitely experiment because everyone’s reactions differ.
The best results for bold lovers who are just starting a cannabis courtship is to start slow. Bardos cautions: “Start with a little puff or two. Make sure you’re in a cozy space with no time crunch and let go.” Bardos also advises: “Approach the moment without any expectations and be prepared for some nights that end in cuddling and talking. Weed is not some magical ‘fix it’ for your sex life.” When it is time to get down to business, Bardos unequivocally declares, “Try weed lube!! It makes vaginas and anuses feel fucking magical.” And who doesn’t like a magical anus?
Bardos has also been generous enough to share one method. First, establish the mood—light some candles and incense, put on good music, get some drinks or fresh fruit ready. Then sit facing your partner (or partners, freaky-ass Seattle), legs wrapped around each other. Take a few tokes. Just breathe with your partner(s) and fall into each other’s eyes. Start tracing patterns on each other’s skin while keeping your eye contact. Allow the exquisite feelings to flow over you. Let the moment lead you wherever it may.
And if you want to do something really sexy that benefits everyone and reps the cannabis community with class, send some financial love to the good folks at the Sex Workers Outreach Program (SWOP), who are working hard to create civil rights for sex workers and education about what sex workers do.