Fad Diet_Mayo Clinic Pyramid.jpg
Copyright Mayo Foundation for Medical Education and Research
The aftermath of holiday overeating combined with the bone-chilling cold of the Pacific Northwest is enough to

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6 Fad Diets You'll Never Finish

Fad Diet_Mayo Clinic Pyramid.jpg
Copyright Mayo Foundation for Medical Education and Research
The aftermath of holiday overeating combined with the bone-chilling cold of the Pacific Northwest is enough to send even the sanest into a fad-diet spiral of death. If the sudden onset of tight-pants syndrome has you wondering if maybe there really is something to the whole Hollywood Cookie Diet, then it's time for an intervention. Whether it eliminates everything from your diet except castor oil and Rice Krispie treats for a week, or claims God himself has certified it--It. Won't. Work. Put down the lemon juice and cayenne pepper as we remind you of all the harebrained fad diets you'll never be able to maintain.

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Credit: http://hollywooddietstore.com/
Hollywood Diet

Whether you opt to throw your dollars down the Cookie, 48-, or 24-hour miracle hole, you know this stuff is laced with six kinds of barely legal stimulants. ou might as well drink a case of Four Loko mixed with Ex-Lax.*

*(This is not an endorsement to do that either, crazy!)


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Credit: www.3-day-diet-plan.com
Three-Day Diet

Just reading the menu for this sad-face calorie-restriction diet makes us want to overeat. With all the black coffee, cottage cheese, and canned tuna, the only thing you're guaranteed to lose is your appetite. Good news? You'll gain an ulcer! YAY!!!!


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Credit: www.everydiet.org
Seven-Day diet

The only thing dumber than a restricted three-day diet is a seven-day diet where you only eat one food group. Let's do the math here:

1 day of fruit + 1 day of veggies + 1 day of fruits and veggies + 1 day of only bananas and milk + 3 days of only meat and greens = insanely screwed-up digestive tract.

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Credit: mastercleansesecrets.com
Master Cleanse

We've all heard some version of this recipe, including maple syrup, cayenne, lemon juice, etc., and seen countless stories about celebrities losing tons of weight from it. If that was your only option for every meal, you'd probably lose weight too. If you're brave enough to attempt drinking this throat-burning, acidic concoction, you should most definitely be rewarded with weight loss.


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Credit: http://www.luckyvitamin.com
Mayo Clinic Diet aka Grapefruit Diet

Although the Mayo Clinic denied any connection to any diet for years, everyone knows the "Grapefruit Diet" sucks. Besides the teeny-tiny portions of actual food that accompanies the grapefruit you have to choke down three times a day, you have to follow it for 12 days. We couldn't last 12 hours on this crazy train. No thanks!


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Credit: www.amazon.com
New Beverly Hills Diet

Just as hard to follow as the seven-day diet, but now new and improved, with more unattainable goals and a side of self-loathing! If the confusion of complex food combining doesn't kill you, the strict timing and schedule will definitely drive you to the nut house. Oh, fad diets, you are so tempting with your empty promises and random restrictions. Now get lost, we've got pizza to eat!

 
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