If you haven't been paying attention this month, you might be thinking that a few dudes in town fell head over heels for their Tom Selleck Halloween costumes. That's right, Seattle: November has been rebranded Movember and its path of destruction has caused some perfectly upstanding citizens to look like full-on pedophiles.
Don't worry, I'm not here to complain that it's completely unfair that (most) women in the PNW can't grow a 'stache. I'm also not going to wax poetic that we're forced to settle for ridiculous Facebook status updates proclaiming "I like it in my trunk".
I get it. The moustache is the rage among hipsters, and it's now set about claiming the upper lips of half the species, for 30 full days, in order to feel justified. While I know it's for a good cause (prostate cancer awareness), let me tell you that it's certainly not doing the ladies any favors. I'm talking to you, Mr. "Who Wants a Moustache Ride".
Now before you tell me that I'm being unsupportive, I'm here to offer a delicious Movember alternative. The fine gentlemen over at Fremont Brewing decided that instead of slowly whittling down their pride this month, they'd birth a nice Porter, name it Mo-Brew and spread its goodness to the masses. The best part is that they're donating one dollar of every pint sold to the Prostate Cancer Foundation.
So, unless you're entrenched in a serious competition with those whiskers of yours, let's make a deal. Shave the 'stache and join me at one of these bars for a pint: