You too can work two jobs for the price of one at Betty!
I don't like when they name restaurants after people but don't include


Betty's Deviation from Burger Building Order Is Heresy!

You too can work two jobs for the price of one at Betty!
I don't like when they name restaurants after people but don't include their first AND last names. Who the fuck is Betty? They should've named this place after someone awesome, like Maximillien Robespierre or Rutger Hauer. I would totally eat everything on the menu at Cafe Rutger Hauer.

Betty may be no Café Rutger Hauer, but it's okay in its own right. The pistachio and rabbit terrine ($11) is rustic as fuck. You get two huge triangles of this coarse pate, barded in thickly sliced bacon. The pate itself was a motley kaleidoscope of meat, like an edible stone patio. It came with ribbons of pickled fennel, thin sour rings of pickled onion, and cornichons. Very tasty.

The risotto ($20) was so creamy it was almost syrupy, as cheesy as an after-school special, and springtime fresh: It had fava beans, mint, asparagus, and pea vines. Unfortunately it was too salty, although it was expertly prepared: Each rice grain was fluffy, individual, and very Libertarian--those motherfuckers just won't stick together.

The Betty Burger ($13) was okay. It was pretty damn juicy, and topped with a melted slice of white cheddar. There was a nice crusty char on the outside of the patty, but the meat was a bit bland. The most offensive thing about the Betty Burger was that they included a side of lettuce, tomatoes, onion, and pickles to put on top of the burger, but then they stuck the top bun onto the melted cheese. So if you actually WANTED to put the vegetables onto your burger, you'd have to put it on the BOTTOM bun--and that's just retarded. If Burger Time has taught us anything (besides the idea that gigantic ingredients have been given the Satanic power to walk around and kill with a single touch), it's the codification of the structure of a hamburger. From the ground up, a hamburger should go: bottom bun, mustard, hamburger, cheese, bacon (if applicable), lettuce, tomato, onion, pickle, ketchup, top bun. Any deviation from this order is heresy!

Another weird quirk at Betty is the unusual management decision to make the chefs and line cooks take the food orders at the bar. There was no waiter around. This is unprecedented! It goes against the natural order! Blasphemy! Arrogance! Insolence! And a whole bunch of other words!

Betty might be better if it actually was called Café Rutger Hauer, but instead it's perfectly okay: not as awesome as Rutger Hauer in Blade Runner, but not as shitty as Rutger Hauer in Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Maybe if they didn't make the cooks do two jobs it would be better. I doubt they pay them twice as much. Do the chefs have to design Betty's website too?

Rating: 6.5 overworked employees out of 10

Betty is located at 1507 Queen Anne Ave N

For reservations call 206-352-3773

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