Has this happened to you? Maybe you're a 9 to 5er off on a national holiday, or, like me, Monday is your Sunday. I don't

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Burgers: For The 831st Time, Red Mill Is Closed On Mondays

Has this happened to you? Maybe you're a 9 to 5er off on a national holiday, or, like me, Monday is your Sunday. I don't know why I disproportionately crave a burger and fries on Mondays, I just do. Like a homing pigeon trained to the secret sauce, Red Mill still remains my default. The patty is twice as fat as a fast food joint, but still not thick enough to show temperature like medium rare, just enough not to shut me down for the afternoon. The milkshakes are stellar. The fries? Not so much. So when you find yourself wanting to tear into a burger, and it's Monday, try:

Two Bells (2313 Fourth Ave., BELLTOWN) The only joint I'll recommend that doesn't serve French fries. While borderlining on sacrilege, Two Bells' meat-laced cole slaw soothes my sense of impropriety. The burger here is juicy and still less than two fingers thick; and the toppings are never too chunky to pile on top, and they have grilled onions and root beer on tap.

Herfy's comes pretty dang close to that medium thick patty, soft-bunned burger ideal. You will have to suffer crinkle fries, though, unless that's your thing. Although, the fries here taste no worse than Red Mill's. A few locations dabble in a disturbingly broad menu selection. Don't get distracted or suspicious; just stick to the burger, and order one of the extra-think shakes. Locations in order of  preference:

5959 Corson Ave S., 764-0980
4401 Fremont Ave N., 547-5891
604 5th Ave S., (206) 264-7800? (inside Uwajimaya)
4537 University Way N.E., 633-3544

The little burger joint that could (kick Red Mill's ass): Zippy's in West Seattle (1413 S.W. Holden, 763-1247). Killer fries, sassy sweet service, an extensive root beer menu, char-broiled patties (as opposed to flat grilled), and milkshakes made with ice cream from Full Tilt in White Center. While we're on the subject of what's open, I find it incredulous that this place is closed on Sundays.

 
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