Your time of reckoning has come! The Puyallup Fair (motto: "It's a doozy!") is accepting entries for its amateur beer and wine competition on one day only: Saturday, July 29.
According to Beer Division coordinator Grace Nilsson, the fair receives about 100 beer entries and 200 wine entries every year. Folks drive in from all over the Puget Sound area for the chance to see how their booze-making skills measure up.
You can find the full list of categories, the extremely strict directions on how to submit your entry, and a copy of the registration form here (click on "Agriculture and Horticulture" to download the PDF). The beer category contains dozens and dozens of categories, from Light American Lager to Metheglin (a type of mead), but the most popular categories, says Nilsson, are generally India Pale Ale and Porter. The heavyweight title round in the wine competition seems to be Raspberry Wine, not Gewürtztraminer.
If you win a first or second place, you'll get a fancy ribbon, $8 or $6 respectively, and a chance to lurk near your bottle during the fair (Sept. 8-24) in order to pounce on unsuspecting gawkers and pontificate on your brewing philosophy. Of course, if your bottles score a "Best in Show," you win bragging rights for life.