rabbitsalbum.jpg
Rabbits

Bites Rites

Good to Die Records

Sept. 18

I wish I had been a fly on the wall when Rabbits was formed.

"OK, so,

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Bites Rites: Sort Of Like The Soundtrack To A Cheap Slasher Film With Car Sex, But Better

rabbitsalbum.jpg
Rabbits

Bites Rites

Good to Die Records

Sept. 18

I wish I had been a fly on the wall when Rabbits was formed.

"OK, so, you know how they say sex sells? Well what if instead of sex, we sold, like, sloshy grind-rock and make a shit ton of noise and just hammer sounds over and over while we try different types of drugs?"

Simply put, Bites Rites is a nine minute schizophrenic onslaught that could easily double as the soundtrack to a low-budget slasher/horror film. The kind where the naive teenage couple is fooling around in a green pickup truck that's parked inconspicuously in the middle of the woods, and after hearing a few noises beneath their car, the passenger window smashes in and the chick has her innards yanked out of her belly button and smeared on the windshield by a crazy man with a hook for a hand. Uncomfortable? Yeah, so is this album ... and it honestly couldn't be better.

Nothing meshes up or makes any sense, but that's the point. "Meth Valley 99" features repetitive spastic "ra ra ra" screaming and pounding snare, then sporadically slows to a crawl before it builds back up with a crescendo of cymbals and more screaming. "On Mars II" is literally 2:21 of God knows what. My guess: sleigh bells being kicked around on the floor while somebody else taps on a wall to the sounds of a fictitious-for-this-example-but-probably-real CD called Sounds of India.

And just so we're all on the same page: this is not metal or hardcore. The only proper word is "rock," and that's only because they are definitely playing instruments plugged into amps and it doesn't sound like jazz or pop. That's as close to a definitive genre classification as you're going to get, and I'm literally paid to think of creative ways to classify bands into genres.

Would I recommend playing this to impress your lady friend on a first date? Absolutely not. But since you considered that a viable option, things probably won't work out anyway, and this will be a really good CD to play on the drive home while you cope. Or, you can punch a wall, jog in place, make weird noises under your breath: nobody is judging. Especially Rabbit. As evident by playing five minutes of this album, they have enough personal problems to worry about.

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