Your Valentine's Guide to a Musical Breakup

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Maybe it's the pressure to be ever so romantic, but breakups and Valentine's Day seem to go hand in hand. So, for those looking for the perfect parting gift, I'd like to encourage you to explore the art of the not-so-subtle mix tape. This method may sound harsh, but in a world of text/email dumpings, at least it shows you put a little thought into your relationship's demise.

Here are two ways to go when you want to show someone the door:

Still Friends

"Don't Speak," No Doubt: Everyone knows this track and it should leave "No Doubt" where this mix is going.

"Apart," The Cure

"Ever Fallen in Love?" The Buzzcocks: Says: "Nothing personal we just made a mistake".

"Love Will Tear Us Apart," Joy Division

"Final Jam," Willie Nelson: This feel-good ditty from Uncle Willie makes it nearly impossible for your (almost) former flame not to remember you fondly.

"Lost Cause," Beck

"End of the Road," Boyz II Men: Even the most dense and/or delusional should be catching on at this point.

"I'll Dream Alone," Magnetic Fields

"Dead Flowers," The Rolling Stones: A biting reminder of your wit and good taste.

"Separate Ways," Journey

"Last Goodbye," Jeff Buckley: Leaving things on a sexy, emo note is essential if there is a chance you'll want to sleep with this person again. Just drunk-dial and start singing.

Never Again

"The Thrill is Gone," BB King: Because you might as well just get to the point.

"You Give Love a Bad Name," Bon Jovi

"99 Problems," Jay Z: What better way to inform said "Bitch" (We've all known plenty a male bitch, so don't get your knickers in a twist) that you regard them as one and you're ever-so-relieved to be rid of them.

"Thank You for Nothing," Elizabeth and the Catapult

"Tonight I Have To Leave It," Shout Out Louds: Things should be clear by now...but if not...

"Good Riddance," Green Day

"Don't Go Away Mad (Just Go Away)," Motely Crue

"Go Your Own Way," Fleetwood Mac: Conveys the sentiment you are passionately pissed and flips your lovin' loser the musical bird.

"Kiss Off," The Violent Femmes

"Fuck it," Eamon: This song is really awful and meant to leave a lasting impression. Your now EX will end this mix wondering if they hate you more for leaving them or subjecting them to this terrible, terrible song.

 
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