Q: Can I pass that Q to you regarding the fact that your daughters are now on the verge of saying farewell to their childhood and at the gateways of starting to party? I know it's a tough question and I mean no disrespect, but I'm a father, too, and I get a chill down my spine whenever I put myself in the shoes of our RNR heroes having to deal with something like that. -- David
In addition to his Thursday column, Duff McKagan is now answering reader questions throughout the week. Write to him at firstname.lastname@example.org. Find all of Duff's posts here.
Certain things will have come up already. When Grace was in the 3rd grade, she asked me why I didn't drink wine when everyone else did at dinner or 'grown-up' parties. I didn't think at that point that she was old enough to notice these types of things-and I took this as a wake-up call that my young kids are very astute. I think most young kids are.
Grace's query gave me an awesome and early opportunity to tell her about my past problems with alcohol and drugs. I told her these things in a way that did not scare her, but simply made her realize that these things were a bad thing for a guy like me. We have more recently hit on the topic that my alcoholism and addiction problems could very well be a family trait and that it is something that she and I should watch out for when she gets older. She knows very well about my past, and more than likely looks at those old photos of me as an embarrassment. I hope she does, anyway.
To add to all of this, and a dilemma that I am now facing, is the book that I am just now finishing. It is a story of redemption in the end, but it does tell my whole story-thorns, pimples, blood, puke, and all. I have told my kids of my past and they have seen the pictures and read the stories. That is all that I can do for now. Well no, there IS one other big thing I can do; and that is to be a loving and trustful Dad.
Hell, I can't hide too much can I? As I write this missive, I am recuperating from a surgery to fix my scarred sinuses from 17 year-old cocaine abuse! My MRI pictures of the battle in my cranium is enough to scare ANY kid straight!