Subject:

Milton Bradley (Baseball)

  • Blogs

    September 29, 2011

    Milton Bradley, Former Mariner/Current Asshole, Arrested Again for Swinging Bat at Wife

    Tragically angry former MLB pine-rider Milton Bradley is in the headlines again The good news is that the story involves a baseball bat. The bad news is that he was supposedly swinging it (and missing) at his wife Monique.

  • Blogs

    May 20, 2011

    9 National League Pitchers Who Out-Hit the 2011 Seattle Mariners

    Image source​The Mariners travel to San Diego tonight to take on their bitter interleague rivals the Padres, and they take with them one of the worst-hitting teams in baseball. Skipper Eric Wedge said it best earlier this week after his club tallied just two runs or fewer in seven of 14 games: ... More >>

  • Blogs

    May 9, 2011

    Mariners Baseball Now With 100 Percent Less Milton Bradley

    Mariners: Right back at you, pal. ​There was a time when Mariners outfielder Milton Bradley's dramatic antics were tolerated because, well, he was sort of a decent ballplayer. Those days are over (and have been for some time). Thus, fresh from a suspension, an assault arrest, and batting a pal ... More >>

  • Blogs

    May 4, 2011

    Milton Bradley Spends Tuesday's Game Suspended, Shooing Away Reporters, After Ump Helmet-Bump Incident

    ​Mariners outfielder Milton Bradley didn't play in Tuesday night's series opener against the Texas Rangers. He was suspended. And as you can imagine, he was super excited to talk it with the reporters who showed up.

  • Blogs

    April 19, 2011

    How to Heckle Horrible Mariners Without Getting Thrown Out of Safeco Field

    ​Safeco Field feels a lot like the Kingdome felt in the '80s, only less fun. Sure, the Safe is a modern marvel of (cookie-cutter) stadium design, the food and drink are swankier, and fans are afforded the benefit of taking in a game in the great outdoors--not that the outdoors are frequently a ... More >>

  • Blogs

    January 19, 2011

    Milton Bradley Arrested in Los Angeles for Threatening a Woman

    ​Mariners part-time outfielder Milton Bradley, fresh from a 73-game season last year in which he held a pitiful .205 batting average, just proved that at least he's still got his A-game when it comes to getting arrested and/or embarrassing the team he plays for.

  • Blogs

    October 19, 2010

    Milton Bradley Used to Have a Small Problem With Eric Wedge

    ​First things first: the fact that perpetual malcontent Milton Bradley once had a problem with an authority figure is not news. If Bradley were an elf, and Santa Claus his boss, the outfielder would find a way to so undermine Jolly St. Nick to the North Pole media that the GM of Christmas woul ... More >>

  • Blogs

    August 12, 2010

    Seven Seattle Times Celebrity House Ads That Failed to Make the Cut

    ​Never mind that its editorial side might actually have to report critically on some of the local luminaries the Times has recruited to appear in its nauseatingly rah-rah house ad campaign, Fairview Fanny is in cahoots with such radiant Seattle personalities as Ciscoe Morris, every last member ... More >>

  • Blogs

    July 12, 2010

    Jack Zduriencik Is Threatening to Become Baseball's Joe Dumars

    ​Former basketball star Joe Dumars is to Detroit as Edgar Martinez is to Seattle. But unlike Martinez, the former Piston works for his onetime employer in the very important position of general manager. Despite dubiously passing on Carmelo Anthony in the draft, he acquired Ben and Rasheed Wall ... More >>

  • Music

    June 30, 2010

    Prelude to a Miss

    What entrance music should Ichiro and his teammates use?

  • Blogs

    June 21, 2010

    The Case for Keeping Cliff Lee

    Should such happiness be forgotten so soon?​For baseball purists, the Mariners home sweep of the heavy-hitting Cincinnati Reds this past weekend, in which Seattle's pitchers yielded a total of one run over three games while scoring a mere seven, was as good as it gets, and provided a glimpse o ... More >>

  • Calendar

    June 9, 2010

    Mariners vs. Chicago Cubs

    Should such happiness be forgotten so soon?​For baseball purists, the Mariners home sweep of the heavy-hitting Cincinnati Reds this past weekend, in which Seattle's pitchers yielded a total of one run over three games while scoring a mere seven, was as good as it gets, and provided a glimpse o ... More >>

  • Blogs

    May 13, 2010

    The Mariners Have a Royal Rumble: Who's the Last Man Left in the Ring?

    Grandpa Sweeney wants to throw down.​After two Mariners players allegedly ratted out Ken Griffey Jr. for falling asleep during a game, designated hitter Mike Sweeney drew a line in the sand during a team meeting by challenging his loose-lipped teammates to a fight. Forget for a second that Sw ... More >>

  • Blogs

    May 7, 2010

    Milton Bradley Decides to Take Some "Me" Time

    They say the first step to recovery is admitting you have a problem.​If you had May 6 in your "When Will the Milton Bradley Experiment Blow Up" office pool, consider yourself a winner. Per yesterday's announcement by the Mariners, Bradley, the self-described Kanye West of Major League Baseba ... More >>

  • Blogs

    May 5, 2010

    Norm's Drinkers Poised to Capitalize On Milton Bradley's Temper, Futility

    For Norm's regulars, Milton's meltdowns can't happen enough.​First-year Mariner Milton Bradley (shown here in the garb of his previous employer) went apeshit and stormed out of the dugout Tuesday night, something he does quite a bit. This tendency, coupled with his shitty .214 batting average, ... More >>

  • Blogs

    May 5, 2010

    Milton Bradley Leaves Mariners' Dugout Mid-Game

    Bradley's not just flipping off the crowd. He's presenting a metaphor for how he treats fans of any team who have the unfortunate task of rooting for him to succeed.​Milton Bradley, baseball's Kanye West if Kanye West were even poutier, kind of has a problem with authority. In that he thinks t ... More >>

  • Blogs

    April 29, 2010

    Byrnt Out: How Much Washed-Up Weight Can the M's Roster Continue to Carry?

    Replace the "cks" with a "g" on the jersey, and this photo would captionize itself.​Some things never change, do they? Just like last year, the Seattle Mariners are a team with a sensational pitching staff--and this is a statement that precedes All-Star acquisition Cliff Lee's debut Friday. An ... More >>

  • Blogs

    March 25, 2010

    Milton Bradley Says He's Baseball's Kanye West

    Yo Zach Grienke, I'm really happy for you and I'mma let you finish, but King Felix had one of the greatest K/9 rations of all-time!​Milton Bradley may have a little trouble accepting responsibility for his actions. The Mariners newest left fielder is, after all, the guy who recently blamed Chi ... More >>

  • Blogs

    March 16, 2010

    Mariners Commercials Fail to Make Use of Crazy Milton Bradley's Acting Chops

    Yes, the 2010 Seattle Mariners commercials -- like "Running Catch," featuring a golf-ball-snagging Franklin Gutierrez -- are cute. But they fail to draw from newest Mariner Milton Bradley's significant well of crazy. And just as you don't trade for a bat only to leave it on the bench, you also don ... More >>

  • News

    February 3, 2010

    Statistical Heat

    Despite positive steps since last season, the computers say the M’s have their work cut out for them.

  • News

    December 23, 2009

    MVP or STD?

    Despite positive steps since last season, the computers say the M’s have their work cut out for them.

  • Blogs

    December 21, 2009

    Carlos Silva-Milton Bradley Trade Brings Out Sports Writing's Creative Side

    The only cure for flare-ups from new Mariner Milton Bradley is a steady dose of Valtrex.​When the Cubs sent bridge-burning malcontent Milton Bradley to the Mariners for sad lump of clay Carlos Silva last Friday, it was more than a pair of new beginnings for two much-maligned baseball players. ... More >>

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