The Macklemore Songs County Officials Should Be Parodying

Say what you will about Macklemore, but there’s no doubt the guy has a sense of civic pride. Previously, he lent his image to a campaign to clean up the Duwamish river. And then there was the time he appeared in an anti-bullying public service announcement with the Mariner’s Felix Hernandez.

Is it any wonder then that Macklemore (AKA MC One To Grow On), would throw his influence behind an effort by King County to address sewage backup?

Last month, King County Waste Waterwaster Treatment officials rolled out a video spoof titled “This is Flushing Awesome.” The eponymous television and radio ads are set to the tune of Macklemore’s “Thrift Shop,” and are schedule to run through September.

Whether it was wise to associate himself with a campaign to curb the flushing of condoms and other improper waste items down toilets is up for debate. But if Macklemore is now allowing his musical stylings to be parodied in public service campaigns, local officials have plenty of better options:

1. “Same Wage” from the Seattle Department of Neighborhoods. Seattle may indeed become a gilded playground for twenty-something Amazon drones who live in hermetically-sealed lofts high above South Lake Union. But an ad campaign set to the tune of Macklemore’s “Same Love” could give solace to those being priced out of Capitol Hill, Ballard and the Central District, and remind that Seattle remains a progressive city where making a living wage is guaranteed, even while finding an affordable apartment within city limits is not.

2. “White Center” from the King County Department of Community and Human Services. Set to the tune of “White Walls,” Macklemore’s paean to the joys of cruising, County officials could use the spoof in attempt to set up White Center and other far flung parts of the county as the affordable alternative to living in Seattle, where finding parking large enough to accommodate a Cadillac can be nearly impossible.

3. “Penis Song” from the Seattle & King County Seattle Department of Health. It’s hard to imagine the 2014 version of Macklemore rapping about his desire for a “bigger schlong,” but he did. Nearly a decade later, this deep cut from Macklemore’s 2005 album The Language of My World seems to already border on parody. So, it shouldn’t be too difficult to adjust the lyrics until the song becomes an earnest safe-sex anthem aimed at some of the more overtly-lascivious rappers who have co-signed Seattle’s own rapper. In other words, make it something befitting modern-day Macklemore.

vcoleman@seattleweekly.com

 
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