Cellar Bistro
Like an extramarital flame, this nook of a restaurant pulls you into its dark, velvety spaces and tastes heavenly compared to what you’re getting at home. A friend of mine once threw a 10-person birthday party here, and the restaurant’s discreet entrance mystified most guests, who had to call for directions a second time once inside because they couldn’t locate the table of familiar faces hidden away in the innermost of four intimate dining rooms. What if you didn’t want to be found? In a nod to the god of drink and debauchery, bunches of fake grapes dangle from this Italian bistro’s latticed ceiling. Bacchus himself would be sated after feasting on free-flowing glasses of clean, house orvieto classico and a two-chicken-breast saltimbocca with ample pieces of salty prosciutto, mozzarella, and cream. The side of fresh cheese tortellini is an unexpected extra—some postcoital cuddling from the entrée. Follow up with espresso-flavored mud pie . . . unless you can think of a better way to cap the evening with your dining partner. SARA NIEGOWSKI
Serves: Italian2355 10th Ave. E., 206-709-8744.
http://www.cellarbistro.com
Dahlak Eritrean Cuisine
There are so many reasons to bring a secret lover to Dahlak. Once a strip club, the restaurant has no windows, so if you both park a block away, no one will ever guess you’re inside. The perfumed room, often hazy with the smell of frankincense burned during the traditional Eritrean coffee ceremony, is awash in spice. So are dishes like zegni beghie, lamb stewed with berbere, a brick-colored blend of chiles and spices that smolders and flares in the mouth. Or the kitfo, ground raw beef stirred together with sumptuous amounts of spiced butter and peppers. Or even the prismatically hued vegetable platter, with its fresh-cooked greens, gingery cabbage and carrots, and creamy red lentils. Even more sensual than the spicing is the pleasure of eating with your hands. As you tear off pieces of spongy, sour injera bread and reach for morsels of food, you and your date’s arms may brush each other, oh so accidentally, or you may find your butter-shined fingertips meeting over the sautéed beef. If you find your passion buzzing as much as your senses will be, the rituals of Ethiopian-Eritrean cuisine permit—in fact, encourage—you to feed your guest with your hands. Don’t gross out the staff by making out, though. Get a room. JONATHAN KAUFFMAN
Serves: Ethiopian2007 S. State St., 206-860-0400.
Shea's Lounge
Cheaters don’t need to worry about the window right in front of the bar here, because it’s difficult to see into this hidden-in-plain-sight boîte. Shea’s Lounge is the casual side to Chez Shea, one of Seattle’s most humbly delicious dining experiences. Snuggled into a table under the half-moon window, observing the sunset, you could be just a couple of tourists or a couple en route to the symphony. It’s your business. The bar menu features its own selection of fanciful, seasonal favorites like bouillabaisse, duck paté with violet mustard, and fennel bisque, and the main dining room’s prix-fixe menus are also available at the bar for maximum lingering. Owners Tomoyo and Koichiro Ikawa have kept the place’s original spirit while bringing a Japanese sense of effortless elegance. The service is gracious and attentive—in the unassuming way of fine Japanese hospitality. Above all, they’re discreet, whether you’re with the mister, the missus, or the mistress. MAGGIE DUTTON
Serves:94 Pike St., 206-467-9990.
http://www.chezshea.com
The Harvest Vine
Discretion is key when deciding where to take your scarlet letter. Somewhere off the beaten path, preferably with few windows. Romance shouldn’t be sacrificed, however, nor should flavor—as long as you’re revving up for sin, might as well go full throttle, right? Harvest Vine abides, with its stone-walled, intimate cellar and menu full of rich and delicious temptations. While the menu changes often to seize the abundance of the season, on a recent visit the kitchen turned out innovative dishes such as baby eels, scrambled delicately with creamy duck eggs, and corazon de pato, tender braised duck hearts served on a ring of lightly fried potato; the post-meal flan was silky and decadent with a hint of spice. Harvest Vine’s food is worth the energy you’ll spend repenting for your indulgence afterward. We can’t vouch for the rest. AJA PECKNOLD
Serves: Spanish2701 E. Madison St., 206-320-9771.
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http://thescarletmacaw.com/harvest_vine.htm