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Ain't no a cheaper high than a single 23-ounce can of Four Loko. For just three bucks you get the alcoholic kick of five or

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Four Loko Makers Must Now Tell You How Insanely Buzzed You Can Get From Drinking It

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Ain't no a cheaper high than a single 23-ounce can of Four Loko. For just three bucks you get the alcoholic kick of five or six beers. The stuff should not be trifled with. We all remember how this crazy-in-a-can crap sent nine Central Washington Students to the hospital a couple of years back after that sorry-ass house party in Roslyn. Quite an "energy drink," all right.

As Seattle Weekly reported then, "Everything was going fine, the music was playing, people were having fun - and then all of a sudden all the girls were puking everywhere," said a partygoer at the time. "Girls were outside on their backs."

Yesterday, the Federal Trade Commission ordered that the makers of this shit, Chicago-based Phusion Project, place on the back of its flavored malt beverage cans an "alcohol facts panel" if the fire water inside contains more than two servings of alcohol. (According to the U.S. Dietary Guidelines, a serving contains 0.6 ounces of pure alcohol.)

While the action may not be as draconian as requiring cigarette companies for putting "may cause lung cancer" labels on the pack, the FTC mandate will likely get the company to move more quickly to settle government's charges of deceptive marketing.

The FTC conceded it does not have jurisdiction to ban Four Loko, or force the company to limit its size or alcohol content -- but only to alert consumers just how potent the liquid is.

Phusion has 90 days to place the facts panel on its products.

The FTC back off its original intentions to require a label on the front of the can with an alcohol comparison to a regular beer, but there were a number of public complaints that said that might lead to binge drinking -- by suggesting Four Loko was a quick, cheap way to get drunk.

Because it is.

 
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