Dan Person wants to see Inslee topless.
In this installment of the Daily Weekly feature "Taking Sides," and in honor of the Amy Biviano controversy


Taking Sides: Which Gov. Candidate Do We Want to See Topless?

Dan Person wants to see Inslee topless.
In this installment of the Daily Weekly feature "Taking Sides," and in honor of the Amy Biviano controversy, Dan Person and Matt Driscoll debate which Washington gubernatorial candidate they'd rather see topless.

Dan Person is itching to see Jay Inslee topless.

If you're one of the five regular readers of our Taking Sides column, you already know about Jay Inslee's penchant for bucking hay.

I brought it up previously to argue that Rob McKenna needs to get his honky-tonk dance moves down if he hopes to appeal to rural Washington.

Then Playboy pictures of a state House candidate from Spokane Valley were brought to light, and we here at the Seattle Weekly Situation Room* had to reckon with a real issue: Which gubernatorial candidate would we rather see topless?

I immediately declared Inslee to be my guy, and once again it comes down to bucking hay. Or kayaking. Or any number of the manly things that man does with that rock of a body.

Bottom line is, Inslee has a proven track record of participating in activities that encourage chiseledness.** Ah yes, one look at that man's jaw tells me there some firmness under that business casual outfit.

And Rob McKenna? Rob McKenna runs. Ergo, he probably has a runner's body. I know a thing or two about runners' bodies, as I've been known to run a decent road race myself. Where other men have abs, we have inexplicable, hollowed out holes. Our ribs can be counted with confidence, so defined are their outlines against the skin or our chest.

These attributes may make McKenna suitable for an American Apparel ad. Maybe they even make you want to vote for him (warning: if you vote for McKenna, the folks over at The Stranger might call you stupid, like, over and over and over again, and how sad would that make you feel?) But it doesn't make me want to see him lose the shirt.

Nope. Go with the hay bucker.

*Photo may not be of actual Seattle Weekly Situation Room

**Chiseledness: Noun. Rocklike. Sexy. Democratic.

See Matt Driscoll's response on the following page ...

Matt Driscoll would rather see McKenna topless.


Fuck it. I want to see Rob McKenna's tits.

I want to see what he's hiding under that sweater of his. I want to know what his pink little nipples look like. I want to see every lonely fleck of chest hair on his debate-club body.

I feel like I hardly know Rob McKenna. Seeing his tits would go a long way toward alleviating this problem. Maybe I'd vote for him if I knew what his conservative funbags looked like.

Dan Person argues that McKenna probably has a runner's body. You're damn right he does. Watch this video (specifically between the 21-25 second marks) and tell me you don't want to see this man's supple, bouncing rack.

Wait. What were we talking about? I got distracted by Rob McKenna's bouncing tits in that video.

Oh yeah! We were talking about Rob McKenna's bouncing tits, and how bad I want to see them.

The sad thing is, I'll probably never get the chance. McKenna doesn't exactly look like the beach-going type, and I'm pretty sure the Barack Obama Man Titty Debacle of 2008 taught all politicians about the dangers of taking your top off in public.

See. I found this graphic on some blog in, like, 12 seconds of Google searching.


Rob McKenna doesn't want you to see his tits. He wants to slip them into the governor's mansion without so much as a cleavage tease. As voters, we can't allow that to happen. As citizens, we deserve to know what McKenna's got under his shirt.

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