If you get anywhere near the medical-marijuana access point HypeHerbally Holistic Health just off I-5 in the Martha Lake area of Lynnwood, you're gonna see the place. It's painted an eye-catching shade of lime green, and there's an "OPEN" sign in the front window. Once you're inside, budtenders John and Justin can guide you through a smallish menu of just over a dozen strains--but the brevity of the menu is out- weighed by the attractive, across-the-board $10-per-gram donation rate.
Blue Dream: An early-morning wake-and-bake test bore out its righteousness
These are some pretty intelligent guys, with an engaging sense of fun. To go with their punning name, they invite patients to come up with the funniest, most exaggerated statement of HypeHerbally hyperbole. You know, like claims of how medicated you are: "I'm higher than Jack Nicholson's hairline," for example. Bring in your funniest HypeHerbally, and if it's chosen "hyperbole of the year," you'll win a free top-shelf ounce. (I know what you're thinking: "Did you even try, word guy?" No, to my shame, I didn't. I was intimidated, OK?)
I selected two eighths (at $40 per) with John's assistance: the sativa-dominant hybrid Blue Dream and the indica strain G-13. He recommended the Blue Dream as one of the best daytime-functional strains, and said G-13 was one of the best indicas in the house.
The Blue Dream's fresh, astringent smell and signature crystal-covered, light-green flowers were inviting, and an early-morning wake-and-bake toke test bore out its righteousness. The strain zaps nausea very quickly, and with a few more tokes, pain is greatly reduced as well. Crucially, though, this relief is achieved without sacrificing the ability to perform everyday tasks--including creative work -- making Blue Dream a very useful strain for patients who want to stay mentally and physically active.
G-13: Don't smoke it.
The first thing I want to say about HypeHerbally's G-13, an indica known for its potent pain relief, is: Don't smoke it. That will lead only to frustration and heartbreak. I learned this, to my sorrow, by trying on three separate occasions to roll up joints of it; whether due to curing methods or some other factor, it just doesn't smoke well or easily.
While G-13 smells quite good, the joints just wouldn't stay lit, and it never seemed possible to get a decent toke. I'd recommend just getting out the vaporizer for this one, but I have to mention one other concern: The ashes left behind by this weed are almost black, which could indicate an inadequate nutrient flush at the end of the growing cycle. Approach this one with caution; if you need a HypeHerbally indica, I'd point you toward one of the other six strains they carry.
New patients at HypeHerbally get a free gram on their first visit when donating for two grams or more, and TGA Seeds are available for patients who want to grow their own medicine.
Steve Elliott edits Toke of the Town, Village Voice Media's site of cannabis news, views, rumor, and humor.
HypeHerbally Holistic Health
?16430 Sixth Ave. W., Lynnwood, 425-582-9385. 11 a.m.-8 p.m. Mon.-Sat. (closed Sun.)