Sonics fans, forget about Sacramento. Why not look a little closer to home? The Portland Trail Blazers aren't doing too well right now. Marcus Camby and Gerald Wallace were unceremoniously dumped recently, and one Mr. Sonic is available for a coaching position after local moneybags Paul Allen fired him yesterday after an embarrassing 42-point loss.
Allen, owner of the Trail Blazers, is hopeful for a rebirth of the Sonics, saying last month that "it's exciting to think about the NBA coming back to Seattle and renewing the rivalry with the Portland Trail Blazers."
Hey, Paul Allen: I have a better idea. What better way to stick it to Portland than to put your money where your mouth is? Why don't you sell the team to Seattle, then we can hire McMillan back as our coach. Of course, you don't have to sell them, you could always try to move them. Why, you could have a home team in every sports league. Just talk to Chris Hansen; he'll fix you right up.
He's got a promised stadium, and he can take that sorry excuse for a team off your hands. They could do with a warm Washington welcome. Besides, Portland has enough image issues to deal with, thanks to the Timbers falling and Portlandia turning stereotyping into an art. C'mon, Allen, you know you want to.
Here blazer-blazer-blazer... heeeeeere blazer-blazer-blazer...