Elderly, Incompetent Bank Robbers Finally Arrested

It used to be that if a man put in a long career of crime work, he could retire at 55 or 60 and live in some nice halfway house or aunt's basement somewhere. These days even after he passes 60, his wits failing, his hair gone, that man still has to get up every few weeks and go rob a bank.

Thankfully the King County Sheriff's Office has helped put a pair of aging alleged robbers out of the working class.

According to KCSO spokesman John Urquhart (speaking of working past retirement age), this pair of 64 and 65-year-old felons is responsible for knocking off three banks since July.

--The first robbery went down July 6 at KeyBank at 17500 Aurora Ave. N. One of the men supposedly walked into the bank and demanded money in an elaborate disguise made by "putting gauze under both eyes."

--Next, on Sept. 12, the pair supposedly entered the Wells Fargo at 14500 Greenwood Ave. N. wearing Halloween masks and armed with a shotgun and a pistol. At one point one of the robbers apparently forgot his gun on the counter, but was fortunately reminded of it by his slightly-less-senile partner.

--Finally, on Oct. 3 the robbers--or at least one of them--allegedly went back to the same KeyBank he robbed the first time (they all look the same). But now instead of a gauze, the robber used a "Bill Clinton mask." Apparently while trying to intimidate the tellers, the robber tried to rack the shotgun but ended up ejecting a shell onto the floor, where, sadly, the man's partner wasn't around to remind him not to forget it.

At any rate, the "Over the Hill Gang," as Urquhart calls them, is in jail now, where we hear the applesauce is free.

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