Sometimes convicted criminals have Facebook pages. Sometimes less-hip convicted criminals have MySpace pages. Brandon Sanchez is of the latter variety. And the photos he's posted there sort of put into serious question his reputation as a guy who will fuck you up if your haircut looks "gay."
On Aug. 11, Mark Bryant came to a party Sanchez was at. Bryant had his hair gelled into a flawless fauxhawk. Brandon didn't like the look of such a do (preferring the preparing-for-prison shaved look), and, according to a report in The Oregonian, told the young man that it looked "gay."
Not long afterward, Sanchez followed Bryant outside as he was leaving and shoved him over a five-foot retaining wall, where his head struck the concrete below. Then Sanchez took off.
The victim was in a coma for three weeks and spent four months in the hospital. He had to quit his job, and apparently hasn't been the same since.
After being convicted last year, Sanchez was sentenced yesterday to four-and-a-half years in prison for the attack.
So what kind of man would assault a stranger for having a haircut that's apparently straight enough for the world's most famous soccer player?
According to his MySpace page: a skinhead who likes Slipknot (a lot), drinking (even more), stealing, smoking, working out his abs, and most of all, dressing in women's clothing.
Let's have a look.
Here's a rather normal shot of the Sanchez taking down a beer bong.
Here's him drinking on the floor with a girl.
Now things get a little weird when he starts wearing a skirt, or, according to the caption: "wearing a skirt dont know y."
Now we're gettin' gay--all right! Wait, maybe not. Sanchez writes: "skin head brother not gay just drunk." Oh, OK. It's just your "skin head brother." Thank God.
Did I mention he likes women's clothing?
Next, because I know that by now you can't get enough Brandon Sanchez, here's a survey he filled out about himself.
Birthday: july 22
Current Location: gresham
Eye Color: brown
Hair Color: brown
Right Handed or Left Handed: right
Your Heritage: spanish
The Shoes You Wore Today: nike
Your Weakness: my sister
Your Fears: my sister
Your Perfect Pizza: sausage
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year: ....
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger: lol
Thoughts First Waking Up: tired
Your Best Physical Feature: abs
Your Bedtime: when ever
Your Most Missed Memory: dog
Pepsi or Coke: coke
MacDonalds or Burger King: burger king
Single or Group Dates: single
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: lipton
Chocolate or Vanilla: vanilla
Cappuccino or Coffee: coffe
Do you Smoke: yes
Do you Swear: yes
Do you Sing: no
Do you Shower Daily: yes
Have you Been in Love: no
Do you want to go to College: no
Do you want to get Married: yes
Do you belive in yourself: yes
Do you get Motion Sickness: no
Do you think you are Attractive: kinda
Are you a Health Freak: yes
Do you get along with your Parents: yes
Do you like Thunderstorms: yes
Do you play an Instrument: no
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol: yes
In the past month have you Smoked: yes
In the past month have you been on Drugs: yes
In the past month have you gone on a Date: no
In the past month have you gone to a Mall: no
In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos: no
In the past month have you eaten Sushi: no
In the past month have you been on Stage: no
In the past month have you been Dumped: no
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping: no
In the past month have you Stolen Anything: yes
Ever been Drunk: yes
Ever been called a Tease: no
Ever been Beaten up: no
Ever Shoplifted: yes
How do you want to Die: sleep
What do you want to be when you Grow Up: personal trainer
What country would you most like to Visit: germany
In a Boy/Girl..
Favourite Eye Color: blue
Favourite Hair Color: blonde
Short or Long Hair: long
Best Clothing Style: short shorts
Number of Drugs I have taken: dont know
Number of CDs I own: dont know
Number of Piercings: none
Number of Tattoos: none
Number of things in my Past I Regret: to many