UPDATE: That's it, folks. Four Loko and its ilk are
officially banned. You now have until Nov. 18 to blaspheme your brains with the liquid blackout.
By the end of business today, Washingtonians will finally know whether they can still march into their nearest beer and wine outlet and order up as much heart palpitating, seizure simulating alcoholic energy drinks as their credit lines will allow. The Washington State Liquor Control Board will vote today on whether drinks like Four Loko, Joose and Earthquake that contain alcohol and caffeine should be banned from all stores.
For those that somehow missed the Four Loko-is-the-Great-Satan story that's been chugged by media everywhere--including us--for a month now, it all started at Central Washington University. On Oct. 8, a bunch of CWU freshmen went buck wild on some Four Loko at a party (cause that's how college kids roll) and nine of them ended up getting carted off to the hospital.
Since then, calls from the farthest corners of our normally pro-alcohol and pro-energy drink nation were heard saying "thou shalt not mix the two" and calling for a ban.
On Friday last week, Michigan became the first state after Utah to ban the drinks (Utah doesn't count because it's less of a state than a large church congregation).
Now the state that provided the weak-livered students who started the drinks' demise will get its chance to puts its laws where its nanny fingers are and ban them once and for all.
The Seattle Times is reporting that the Board is all but certain to authorize the ban.
For us at the Weekly, we're just happy to possibly quit writing about whether the beverages will be outlawed and start writing about where you can still get your hands on them once they are.