Harley Davidson Ironwing is the Andrew Ridgeley to Colton Harris-Moore's George Michael. While the Barefoot Bandit was doing his best modern-Jesse James impression by hot-wiring a Cessna and crash-landing it in the Caribbean, his accomplice with the cool name was getting busted by Camano Island cops. Now, Ironwing is back in jail, this time for pulling another low-rent caper: stealing string cheese.
According to the Everett Herald, the 20-year-old pleaded guilty on Thursday to third-degree assault after knocking down and injuring an 85-year-old man while trying to rob a grocery store last June.
Ironwing hid string cheese in his pants while in the grocery store before a store employee began chasing him.
Ironwing was sprinting out the front door of the store when he spotted a sheriff's deputy. He turned a different direction and ran toward an elderly couple, according to court papers.
The deputy tackled Ironwing and the pair fell into the man, knocking him to the ground.
For trying to make off with some mozzarella, Ironwing will now serve a year-and-a-half in prison. Sentencing experts speculate that he'll probably get out a little earlier though, and will most likely invent a fictitious story for why he's locked up, so as not to be laughed at by his fellow inmates.