comagirl.jpg
I consider myself a pretty normal woman with an average sex drive, but there are certain circumstances when there is no fucking way I'm going

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Today in Sex: If She Can't Say Yes (or No), Is It Rape?

comagirl.jpg
I consider myself a pretty normal woman with an average sex drive, but there are certain circumstances when there is no fucking way I'm going to be making the sweet monkey love. Like if I'm angry, sad or otherwise hurtin', forget about it. If I'm sneezing, coughing, puking or feverish, boyfriend has a better chance of convincing Dita Von Teese to get down with him. So while I don't know for certain that this profoundly brain-damaged, tube-fed, incontinent mother of two wasn't gung-ho to have sex with her husband, neither did he.

Not only did "Mr. Z" have sex with his 29-year-old wife--ethicist Julian Sheather writes in a blog for the BMJ (British Medical Journal),

"Recently doctors discovered that she was pregnant. The pregnancy was subsequently terminated but her brothers filed criminal charges accusing her husband of rape, arguing that any form of sexual activity involving someone with such diminished capacity was unlawful. Mr. Z argued in defence that his wife would have wanted their intimacy to continue and that the law had no place in the privacy of their bedroom.

The case is currently in the courts and is also being debated by bioethicists at the Hastings Center. They write,

Mr. Z is adamant that his wife would have wanted to maintain a physical relationship with him and that what takes place in the privacy of their bedroom is not something that should interest the probate courts or the police. As evidence of his fidelity to his marriage vows he argues that he did not divorce his wife when she became disabled and that he still loves her and finds her attractive.

Mrs. Z's brothers are understandably furious that her husband is still having sex with their sister, who is so impaired she can't even speak. While my first reaction was to side with her brothers, I'd urge you to go through and read the ethicist's arguments at the Hastings Center. You have to register, but it's free.

And if you feel strongly one way or the other, maybe you want to add an addendum to your Living Will. Mine will read: No Fucking Way.

 
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