Eddie Vedder -- last seen trying in vain to offset his band's carbon footprint -- was in Cleveland last night fronting Pearl Jam's sold-out show. And in between growling out a few hits, he gave Cavalier fans worried about the possible exodus of Ohio savior LeBron James to Brooklyn another foam finger to chew on.
Why go home, LeBron? Because no matter how bad the Cavs get, they're still better than the Nets.
As Associated Press writer and concert attendee Tom Withers Tweeted: "Eddie Vedder to Cleveland fans: 'Don't let Jay-Z steal your superstar. We're from Seattle, they stole our whole team.'"
Or, translated to Pearl Jam-ese, "If you look in my hometown's Rear View Mirror, you'll see it's Black. You won't find a Better Man. He's a Ten. Don't let him Go."
Thus ends the lamest game of Madlibbed song titles ever. You're welcome.