Sorry Seattle: In order to save the earth you're going to have to off this dog.
The Seattle Times is having all sorts of fun with a New Zealand report that claims a medium-size dog leaves a larger eco-footprint than an SUV. The study, called "Time to Eat the Dog? The Real Guide to Sustainable Living," argues that the amount of land needed to raise the animals used to feed your average labradoodle is the environmental equal of driving a Hummer.
Is the science any good? That's for smarter people to debate. What's important is finding a way to make this about Seattle, a city that generally enjoys turning up its nose at a lady driving a Land Cruiser while alternately going mushy over the mom walking a Mastiff. That, at least, was the thinking of reporter Mark Rahner.
Rahner -- apparently taking his full dose of Whimsy this morning -- took it upon himself to call city pols to find out what they think ought to be done about the Fido fallout.
Mayor Greg Nickels spokesman said his boss never answers a "hypothetical" and candidate Mike McGinn didn't return a call. Only Joe Mallahan's campaign seemed (somewhat) up to the challenge of taking (somewhat) seriously a reporter's silly question.
Joe Mallahan's spokeswoman, Charla Neuman -- who owns two St. Bernards -- refused to relay questions on the topic to Mallahan.
"Thank god this wasn't paid for by taxpayer dollars," Neuman said of the New Zealand study, while spinning the matter thusly: "Take the combination of Joe having a small dog and driving a Prius, and he'll be a very green mayor."
Times commenters, as is their want, are going typically bonkers over the article, labeling it everything from a waste of space to further proof that Al Gore is full of shit.
But amidst the griping, some are offering constructive solutions to Seattle's potential canine-carbon conundrum. Says user cdub509: "That's only if you feed them... Just let them snack on stray cats and table scraps to reduce everyone's footprint."