Things You Find Out While Reading Colton Harris-Moore's Police File

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What does twink porn, bear mace and a credit card have in common...Colton Harris-Moore's police report
Teenage boys generally aren't what you would call frugal. But then most teenage boys aren't notorious serial burglars hiding out from police in the forested wilds and empty vacation homes of their hometowns. Wallets tend to be tight in those situations, stolen credit cards or no. It's enough to make even the most frivolous spender go fiscally conservative.

So what exactly did Colton Harris-Moore and his partner in crime with the 80's action movie hero cum pornstar handle spend money on during their 2007 burglary spree? The essentials of course.

According to an affidavit filed by Island County police, after breaking into the home of one Camano Island resident in January 2007, the so-called barefoot burglar used the internet connection to purchase three containers of bear mace (presumably to avoid being Grizzly Man'd), a computer program called Evidence Eraser and membership with an online gay male pornography site called (Warning: really not NSFW).

The affidavit is unsurprisingly short on context. As a result, questions abound. Do twinks attract bears, requiring some sort of repellent? How exactly does a teenage legend in the making relax after a long day of evading the cops? Unfortunately, police will actually have to catch Colton before we get any answers.

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