Slogging through press releases - and occasionally being asked to rewrite them - is probably one of the more time consuming and dreary elements of

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How Not to Get Out of a Speeding Ticket

Slogging through press releases - and occasionally being asked to rewrite them - is probably one of the more time consuming and dreary elements of the newspaper profession. But every once in a while you hit paydirt.

For my money, the best press releases are always the understated missives put out by law enforcement, particularly when they deal with interactions between officers and the colorful characters dwelling in the seedy underbelly of society.

Consider this latest offering, put out Tuesday, by the Washington State Patrol.

"Man Drives 110mph to Make a Bid on EBay

A 46 year old Fall City man was arrested for reckless driving after he was observed traveling 110mph on the I-90 floating bridge. When stopped he advised the trooper that he was trying to get home to make a bid on eBay before the auction closed.

A trooper observed James Garrett's vehicle at an extremely high rate of speed as he was passing other motorists in the express lanes of eastbound I-90 in the Mount Baker Tunnel. As the vehicle exited the tunnel the trooper obtained a radar reading of 100mph. While attempting to catch up with the vehicle, the trooper obtained a second radar reading of 110mph as it proceeded over the floating bridge.

The trooper activated his emergency equipment to conduct a traffic stop at the east end of the bridge. Garrett continued at a high rate of speed through the Mercer Island Lid and exited onto Mercer Island where he eventually stopped.

After Garrett was in custody he advised the trooper he was late placing the bid on eBay. Garrett's vehicle was impounded and he was booked into the King County Jail on Reckless Driving charges. Garrett has multiple criminal convictions for driving related offenses."

That's a dedicated bargain hunter. Although it looks like the Trooper involved in the incident was somewhat underwhelmed by Garrett's thrifty veracity.

Extra: The press release does not state what item Garrett was bidding on. But as an aside, they do sell radar detectors on eBay.

 
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