Spam with Style


As a System Administrator, I hate spam with the heat of a thousand blazing suns. Spam runs the gamut from the merely annoying (and ultimately useless) penis enlargement advertisements to the destructive Trojan-laced messages that will mess up your computer proper.

However, I am somewhat enjoying the latest flavor: the MSNBC Breaking News spam that has bombarded email systems this week. Yes, malware is bad, but I gotta admit: this spammer's got style. After starting out with mostly mundane headlines (‘Google launches free music downloads in China;’ ‘Stocks set to fall on recession;’) the spam subject lines are now running with a satirical bent, taking subtle jabs at the 24-hour news channels where every single event can be trumpeted as 'breaking news.'

A few favorites from the past few days: BREAKING NEWS: Police Raid Donut City

OK, this one is a bit ‘on the nose.’ Still, it reminded of one of my favorite teen movies: 1984’s The Wild Life, which includes a song called “Donut City” by Eddie Van Halen. BREAKING NEWS: McCain to 'Match' Obama With Tour of Epcot's 'World Showcase'

That’s just quality comedy. I almost clicked on the link just to reward their sense of humor. BREAKING NEWS: Mccain And Bush To Dance In Puppet Show

This is Spinal Tap sprang to mind here: “If I told them once, I told them a thousand times: put ‘McCain and Bush’ first and ‘Puppet Show’ last.” I’d like to know which puppet show they’ll be dancing on (and if we have any say, I’d vote for Sifl and Olly.) - BREAKING NEWS: Don Majkowski Demands to be Reinstated as Packers Quarterback

This is the best. The Majik Man! Right on! Sure he's been retired for 12 years or so, but why not? I was kind of hoping this one was true, if for no other reason than to anticipate the next headline: Disgruntled Packers QB Aaron Rogers takes hostages at Lambeau Field.

And finally, the cherry on the sundae: BREAKING NEWS: No one killed in Bancroft, West Virginia Today

Since the population of Bancroft is around 367, this is very good news. Congrats, Bancroft!

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