Barrels of Fun

What's more useful than a Swiss Army knife?


By now you've heard about the Kitsap County man who attempted to loosen a stuck lug nut on his car with a shotgun. Like that is so wrong? Here in Seattle, it turns out that a shotgun is a safe, versatile tool for a surprising array of vexing urban problems, including:

Frozen or buggy personal computer: control, alt, shoot.

Removing last bit of toothpaste from tube.

When accidentally locked out of house (first warn children away from front door).

Alternative to cheese grater.

Convenient means of reducing downed trees to mulch; proven safer than wood chipper!


Celebratory firing in air at weddings and bar mitzvahs.

When remote is missing, easier way to turn off TV than getting off the damn couch.

Lawn aeration.

Cheaper than playing skeet shooter on your Wii.

Great conversation starter at bars.

Mixing paint (small gauge recommended).

Can substitute for missing whiffle bat (remember to engage safety while swinging from barrel).

Tossing salad.

Removing ugly popcorn ceiling from your condo without the hassle of a ladder.

Distressing your own designer jeans.

When the third flush still doesn?t work.


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