Best Place for a Last Date

Chuck E. Cheese's

Let's say you don't want to have kids and your boyfriend does. It might seem counterintuitive, but take him to Chuck E. Cheese's. It's total chaos, featuring kids and parents at their most unhinged and annoying. A visit to Chuck E. Cheese's will destroy your confidence in the human race, scuttle any thoughts of procreating, and make the idea of a committed relationship which one day results in acquiescing to your child's demand to take a bunch of friends to Chuck E. Cheese's utterly deplorable. You'll want to go fuck around with consenting adults, far away from singing, mechanized rats and the person you brought there to stealthily dump. MIKE SEELY Multiple suburban locations,

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