Captain Hook would not approve of Dragonfire Pirate Camp. It's not that the place lacks pirate credentials. From the Jolly Roger flag on the lookout tower, where young scalawags watch for parental intruders, to the pirate songs the scurvy lot belt out every morning, the Maury Island day camp has swashbuckler cred to spare. But Hook hates children, and if you want to make your offspring miserable, sending them to Pirate Camp is probably the worst way to do it. For a week, campers dress in rags, wield wooden swords, and take turns with duties like cooking Gull Noodle soup in the galley. The heavily bearded Cap'n Jim Sir and his wife Cap'n Jacq Ma'am, who sell driftwood furniture to the non-pirating world as Jim and Jackie Chobot at Pike Place Market, make the magic; for eight weeks every summer they open the skull and crossbones–marked gates of their wooded property to 1st through 5th graders. Spots in the camps go fast, so sign your kids up now for next year. ?Rebecca Cohen 463-3944; location a secret