I demand a recount! Last year, Seattle Weekly told you the best place to heckle those obnoxious, amphibious tourist-mobiles, the Ducks, was the Pacific Inn Pub. But why abuse them on land when absolute devastation is achievable while kayaking alongside the vulnerable tourist traps on Lake Union? Any camera-toting, sunscreen-slathered visitor will be a sitting duck as you stealthily paddle close to the former war craft and unleash a flurry of splashes with some quick paddle strokes. (Don't forget to scream obscenities!) A strong paddler can then easily escape the impending wrath and return to sipping hard lemonade from the on-board cup holder. Now that's how it's done.—Joshua Lynch