Leo (July 23–Aug. 22)
What you're doing, essentially, is planting a garden and then simply banking on regular rainfall. Unfortunately, the universe isn't exactly on board with your plan. While you'll certainly be graced with a refreshing downpour or two, you can't count on them coming regularly or frequently enough to keep your flowers and veggies alive. You've got to take matters into your own hands, unwind the garden hose, and give your plants a good sprinkle nearly every day, or you'll end up with a vegetable patch full of withered husks. At that point, you might as well not have wasted your time planting anything at all.
Virgo (Aug. 23–Sept. 22)
If you ate a huge hunk of smelly gorgonzola right before lying down to sleep, would you be particularly surprised if your night was populated by bizarre or disturbing dreams? I'm worried, because in the areas of your chief blind spots (particularly romantic/social relationships), you've lost touch with some of the basics of causality, and are then surprised when your actions lead to their logical conclusions. Think things through. If you really aren't sure what will happen if you say or do something, ask someone who might have a clue—before you say or do it.
Libra (Sept. 23–Oct. 22)
Right now you can be emotional or you can be sensible, but not both. Will you resist the temptation to react to stressful situations in a hysterical, instinctive way, or will cool-headed logic and reason prevail? While the former may be immediately emotionally gratifying, it's not likely to resolve or improve things—in fact, it's only likely to lead to a long (perhaps endless) series of fiery flare-ups that will, probably, ultimately be much more stress than they're worth. I trust that these circumstances will teach you a lot about yourself—but whether or not it's stuff you'll be pleased to learn, in the long run, has yet to be determined.
Scorpio (Oct. 23–Nov. 21)
Walking down the street wearing a sandwich board proclaiming "DATE ME" might actually get you a date or three, believe it or not. True, most of the people who'd likely take you up on that offer are people you'd probably rather have nothing to do with, but I'm afraid shunning such a strategy has more to do with your snobbishness and ego rather than its supposed ineffectiveness. Well, which are you more attached to—not being the least bit embarrassed, ever, or ultimately getting what you want, even if getting there is a bit uncomfortable?
Sagittarius (Nov. 22–Dec. 21)
Some people get a bit of power and it goes straight to their heads, more intoxicating than bubbly champagne. You rarely play the role of petty authoritarian, though. Usually you keep a cool head; you know the true sign of strength is never having to exercise your power. Keep that in mind this week, as you'll have ample opportunity to flex your muscles and throw your weight around, but hardly any legitimate reason to do so. Don't be petty. Instead, make a game of figuring out ways to get things you want without having to do much of anything at all.
Capricorn (Dec. 22–Jan. 19)
I understand the temptation, when walking by someone's precarious, wobbling house of cards, to knock it down. It's so easy—a breath of wind, a lit match, or an angrily-stomped foot would be enough to send the whole thing crashing to bits. You could tell yourself it's for their own good. That may be so, but seeing as how the thing is going to crumble no matter what, it doesn't need to be you who sends it tumbling. Instead, tiptoe by, so that instead of being the person resented for shattering a dream, you can be the one who comforts the bereaved dream-mourner—and perhaps helps them build something a little more robust the next time around.
Aquarius (Jan. 20–Feb. 18)
The people we fall in love with are usually those we feel we have a lot in common with, but who still manage to surprise us. If you're trying to get someone to fall in love with you, the trick, of course, is knowing when to emphasize all the ways you're the same and when to celebrate and focus on your fascinating differences. This tricky balancing act applies in virtually any social situation, of course, but walking that wobbly tightrope confidently and well is this week's special challenge—all the more exciting because you're performing it without a safety net. You fall, you splat.
Pisces (Feb. 19–March 20)
Many imminent parents ask their doctors not to reveal the gender of their unborn child, preferring to be surprised on the day. They simply prepare for either possibility. I understand this kind of willful ignorance, since it potentially adds to life's pleasure and joy. But you've taken it a bit too far. You're refusing to acknowledge or hear much more vital information; the equivalent would be a mother not wanting to know she was pregnant with quintuplets. This is stuff that would be virtually impossible to prepare for without advance knowledge. Open your ears, and your mind, and hear what you need to hear before it sneaks up on you and bites you in the ass.
