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R.Fernando 09/27/2010 4:43:00 PM
I dated a bartender from Boston once - we were awesome..Hehe
stillmy best friend-woohoooo
take that..sucker
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Desarae A. Veit 06/10/2010 11:29:00 PM
I found this blog post from Barry, a Columbus bound Irish bar blogger @manageyourbar, and love this post. I think your points should apply to ANY man looking to hit on a girl. Have a plan, don't just ask me to dinner, and God help you DON'T just say will you go out with me and oh what do you want to do? I don't want to play that guessing game and am more then comfortable going out with my girl friends. Again cute post!
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Lorna 01/10/2010 1:10:00 PM
How incredibly accurate and hilarious! I wish I could print this out and leave it on the bar for some of my regulars to read!
I'm running out of clever ways to avoid having to say "no". I just make a jokes in return and never give them an answer ( i.e.: Dude : "So what are you doing Thursday? Can I take you out for dinner? Me: "Nah, I don't eat. Haha!"/"You know this place, I never no my schedule!"/" What?! You don't want to take me out to dinner. I saw you checking out that girl earier! She's hot. You should definitely buy her a drink"
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Dave Fier 04/24/2009 9:29:00 AM
I must say that congratulations are in order to Ms. Maggie for fabricating this extraordinary artful propaganda. After all, is it not true that all men are crude beasts who serve no master but their own selfish indulgences? Indeed, who are we to brave an attempt at casual conversation, whilst enjoying a brew, with our social betters?
We are low and we are inferior. We tremble before the righteous depiction of women and their global hierarchy; their perspectives need not be wasted or even questioned by the lowly gutter trash that is the male gender.
I offer my apologies, writer. My satirical ranting is not meant to insult, only to enlighten. Sadly, it never ceases to amaze me how ridiculous, sexist, and biased articles like this are.
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cg 03/11/2009 7:50:00 PM
bring a gift??? yea, that's not creepy
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Matt 03/11/2009 9:44:00 AM
You sound like a bitch.
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a 03/09/2009 12:03:00 AM
this article makes it sound like the author is pretty bitter and unattractive
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drax 03/04/2009 3:12:00 PM
I think this article is a little harsh, and maybe a tad defensive. My work used to take me around the world a lot and in my time I've hooked up with five female bartenders. I guess I had an advantage being a Brit when I was in Dallas and again in Toronto, girls seem to dig the accent though I honestly don't know why.
In all these cases I'd be sitting at the bar, usually reading a book, hey I'm in a new town where I don't know anybody and I like bars and pubs. I never actively tried to pick them up, but a conversation would arise, always from a comment she made and we'd follow on from there.
There's no "trick" or method, just be yourself, don't come across as pompous or condescending, don't enter into any conversation with any expectations either. Nine times out of ten the lady just wants some halfway decent conversation that doesn't revolve around sports, breast size or income. If you wanna make an impression then *stop* drinking alcohol, you don't have to make any excuses about it, but have a couple of sodas in between beers.
Bartenders see their customers at their worst, drunk, lonely, desperate. Show them there's an alternative. Oh and don't over tip, that just sends all the wrong signals.
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nick 02/21/2009 2:39:00 AM
as someone that was a high level nightclub male bartender in chicago that got to witness the spectacle of hopeless idiots hitting on the female staff i'd say this is a very accurate article. anyone that has experience of working behind a solid bar knows that there are a lot of unspoken rules on how bartenders interact with each other behind the bar and interact with costumers to pay the rent. the one thing that was left out of this article is that most guys are too dumb to realize is that most of the female bartenders they are hitting on are often already involved in relationships. It's part of the job description to flirt. and even if your smart enough to know that. we'll still figure out a way to empty your pockets of money. it's what we do best :)
great article
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Dave M 02/19/2009 9:14:00 AM
Hehehehe - "Duck, You Sucker". Gotta love the Sergio Leone reference!
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annette 02/19/2009 5:07:00 AM
Perhaps there might be some lesbian bar patrons, or perhaps there may be some lesbian bartenders.
not to mention a wide variety of other orientations and subjectivities.
dick.
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David 02/19/2009 5:06:00 AM
Incredible. Absolutely hilarious. I love it. Accurate doesn't even begin to describe it.
Thank you!
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Jay 02/19/2009 4:29:00 AM
Wow.
Someone certainly has an ego about themselves for not being all that attractive.
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Perry Mar 02/19/2009 4:07:00 AM
Well that wasn't really useful.
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kwago 02/19/2009 1:11:00 AM
I can't wait till robots replace bartenders
They could always hear what you say
They wouldnt screw up your drink order
They would be fast
That would be freaking rad if a robot served me a drink
They have machines that can put freaking cars together, you can't have one that can pour a freaking liquid into a glass or pop open a bottle?
It would rid the world of this worthless (yes, worthless) job forever. Yes it is worthless, hardly ever do you see a real bartender that can serve a drink creatively. I have and he was a big ugly fat dude that blew fire, not some stuck up chick with a god complex that can't hold a real job.
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T~ 02/19/2009 1:09:00 AM
Good to see that being a bartender hasn't made you bitter against men.
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Mark Fefer 02/19/2009 12:30:00 AM
Yes Chris, the piece first appeared (in slightly different form) on our food blog, Voracious, where Maggie writes a regular column called Ask the Bartender. We then ran it in print for our Valentine's issue.
Mark Fefer
Seattle Weekly editor
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Rory O'Connor 02/18/2009 11:45:00 PM
People like you are the problem with Seattle
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Allison 02/18/2009 11:29:00 PM
Agreed on all except the small gift bit. If any guy gives me a small gift while I'm working I'm going to think he's creepy and trying to buy my affections.
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Chris 02/18/2009 11:18:00 PM
Curses, double posting. Google Chrome is not my friend.
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Chris 02/18/2009 11:10:00 PM
Re-using old content huh? :P
http://blogs.seattleweekly.com/voracious/2008/11/ask_the_bartenderout_cringe.php
Guess there's nothing important to write about going on in the country right now.
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Mike Hadidiacos 02/18/2009 10:16:00 PM
She better be hot as shit to waste my time on her.....
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christian behrendt 02/18/2009 10:10:00 PM
I believe a person from digg.com summed it up pretty well.
------------------------------------------------------------
Seriously, I don't understand their mentality, like every guys dream is to score with the female bartender who according to this article is the most sexually intimidating and dignified kind of woman. Get over yourselves, please. You're a damn bartender for god's sake making like $10 an hour, not some successful attorney or hot ass celebrity. How about an article that goes like this: "So you're a somewhat attractive bartender that has to work graveyard shifts to barely make ends meet, what do you think the chances of you ending up with a smart, professional, and decent guy is?" How about making us guys the prize for once? Sheesh, a fucking bartender? Really. Get me a drink bitch. No tip for your self obsessed ass, you're probably too good for it anyway.
---------------------------------------------------------
QFT.
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Chris 02/18/2009 9:55:00 PM
by following this advice, i would have never got the numbers of those cute bartenders over the years. use with caution
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Dave Himself 02/18/2009 9:13:00 PM
You should strongly consider letting Maggie Savarino Dutton go. Or at least give her a warning. Her article 'So You Want to Hit on the Bartender?' Is such nonsense that I am surprised it even made it to the internet.
This piece has all the insight of a "douchebag with a popped collar." I am surprised there is no "number 5) She is probably a friggin' lesbian anyway."
As a bartender of 15 years I know dozens of female bartenders and I have dated a hand full. When describing female bartenders, the one fact that will hold true every time is that they are bartenders. That's all. They are all as varied in their ways as women tend to be.
I can only assume that Maggie has never tended bar nor has she ever approached one. People are actually banding together on the internet to discuss how utterly wrong this article is and I thought you should know.
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Suzie 02/18/2009 9:11:00 PM
I met my husband in a bar that I used to work at. The truth is, sober or not, douche bags are douche bags...bartenders just see it faster as alcohol is a douche catalyst. My husband simply sat, drank and smiled. He is the man (and accuratly assessed his hottness).
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Mark 02/18/2009 7:35:00 PM
This is such a joke. I need to be super special to date some chick who best hope for success in life is, by her own admission, such a miserable job that it leaves her the most jaded female on the planet. The best she can do is a job watching people she clearly sees as losers hook up drunk at closing time, and she has the arrocance to think she is special and above all that? She is a part of it.
Not only that, but the stupidist line in the whol article is where she says Hey, I flirt alot, but you shouldn't take me seriously. Wtf? Just because you are a disengenuous, game playing, two-faced loser in a tank top, doesn;t mean everybody else needs to be so jaded that they see everyone's actions and words as lies designed to manipulate money or sex out of them.
The woman that wrote this is the lowest common denominator of women out there and is likely a very unhappy person
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sean 02/18/2009 6:19:00 PM
This is silly.. "you better be a pretty exceptional guy" HA! The female bartender (or any bartender) at your average establishment is on the low end of the success pole. Why must you be exceptional to date somebody that is pouring people shots for a living? Maybe after they graduate and get a real job they would deserve a bit more exceptional guy but for now they should just be happy to find a guy that can pay the bills.
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michael 02/18/2009 6:07:00 PM
Maggie,
Can I cook you a meal sometime?
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Jay 02/18/2009 5:52:00 PM
After reading this, I'm going to have to "call" female bartenders that flirt forever more.
Don't worry, I try to make politicians and other people who lie for money feel awkward too.
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Corey 02/18/2009 5:51:00 PM
As a member of the 20+ agegroup of male bar goers I enjoyed this extremely honest and quite amusing post early in my workday. I enjoyed it so much I am going to run a personal experement and actually try to use the colums advice for no other reason than to see if I can pull it off. Keep up the great( and dry ) writing!
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Razam 02/18/2009 5:01:00 PM
This has to be the most pessimistic article I have ever read. A real time-waster! Did you right this right after being left on someone's bed unsatisfied?
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Alon 02/18/2009 2:26:00 PM
I took the plunge, asked the hot bartender out, and she turned out to be the most amazing person I've ever known -- and we're getting married in 3 months :)
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skynut 02/18/2009 1:13:00 PM
Why would you want to date a bartender anyway? Look for someone educated and worth the time.
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Ruggy 02/18/2009 1:11:00 PM
Bartenders, even well-built scantily-clad friendly and pretty cocktail waitress types, are about the only women I will never ever be able to find attractive; especially in this era of life-threatening STD's.
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Tahko Tetsujing 02/18/2009 1:07:00 PM
I was a bartender and a bouncer. Your article is crap.
There are several things wrong with this poorly written rant.
1) You are not paid to flirt with anyone. You are paid to serve drinks. Though it is true that if you use flirtation, you will get more tips but there isn't any kind of rule that says you HAVE TO because it's your job. That's ludicrous. What you are actually doing is leading a man on to get them to be more attracted to you so that they will give you more money. To that effect, you may have clothes on and no pole around, but it does make you a bit of a whore none the less.
You get jaded with all the flirting that goes on yet you flirt for bucks. You don't have sex for money, you lead people on for money, and that's almost worse. If you get called out on it, it is the risk that you pay for jerking your patrons around.
2) Isn't attraction a relative perception? who is to say what is attractive to one girl isn't to another bartender or not? I'm a fat ugly bastard and I know that. The bartender I dated liked me anyway.
3) You mean to tell my that every bartender after five or more nights of busting tail on her feet is going to want to be active on their day off? Perhaps if they do cocaine....
I take number three back.
4) "The female bartender is perhaps the most jaded, cold, walled-off, and unapproachable member of the female species."
And yet you claim to be paid for giving the impression of being approachable. I think you are seriously thinking only of yourself here.
http://www.pushthenet.com
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jack spayed 02/18/2009 12:06:00 PM
hooking up with the chick bartender...
Step 1: grow some balls
Step 2: get some kind of game
Step 3: remember she's just like every other girl in the world, so - go for it.
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Casey Poehner 02/18/2009 12:04:00 PM
I successfully pulled off getting a very attractive bartender's number. She turned out to be almost 10 years older than me, which didn't bother me, but seemed to turn her off a little bit. We did finally hit it off, six months after I initially got her number. So guys, keep your head on a swivel and eyes on the prize. If it feels right, go for it.
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hastings 02/18/2009 11:26:00 AM
Does this mean all female bartenders lesbians?
Either you like boys or you don't, right?
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Luke 02/18/2009 11:22:00 AM
From working in a bar I have to agree, bar girls are paid to be nice and so many guys get the wrong idea. The only strategy I would suggest if people want to pick up a bar person is :
1) Stay sober. Bar people get a hatred of drunks unless they are drunk.
2) After some polite, but friendly chit chat that establishes you are more than just a regular customer, ask them where they would go after their bar shuts, or where they go for a drink themselves.
Then just show up to that bar, if they also show up, then you are in with a good chance. If they don't, then they were just being polite and earning your tips. Unfortunately this tip may be hard to use on a girl that works in a bar that shuts at 8 in the morning
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Bob 02/18/2009 11:19:00 AM
I prefer women with real jobs.
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Cesar 02/12/2009 3:15:00 AM
Hahaha your funny, I never thought of bartenders that way before. I guess you wouldn't ever need to take a psych class in school with all you see every night....
