Drinking establishment: Vintage Lounge, in Daniel’s Broiler, 10500 N.E. Eighth St., 425-462-4662, www.schwartzbros.com/vintage.cfm, BELLEVUE

Bartender: Janenne “S” (as in “skeptical” about giving her last name to a stranger pointing a camera in her face?)

Where she learned her vino 101: “I’ve been trained through the restaurant. I learn as I go, and I ask a lot of questions and sample the wine with the experts.”

Recommendation: “It all depends on your taste. Everyone’s palate is different,” especially when you’re dealing with a 900-bottle monster of a wine list. But it’s never risky to pour a glass of 2005 Two Hands Bella’s Garden Shiraz from Australia, which—rated at 94 points—is “the second-best shiraz in the world.” The world! No word on which shiraz is first.

Tastes like: Twenty dollars’ worth of inky, plump, purple plums and mulberry, with a tiny bit of anise and cedar spice. De-freaking-licious. Vintage Lounge can serve this class of wine by the glass because of a fancy tap system that preserves the wine airtight in the bottle between pours (like a keg for rich people).

So this is your favorite drink? “Personally, I like chardonnay.”

So chardonnay is your favorite drink? “Well, this isn’t where people drink my favorite—I can tell you, but you can’t tell anyone….”

Recipe that would kick ass if Bud Light happened to be her favorite drink: Beer ‘ritas—pour a Bud Light, a can of frozen limeade, and a bunch of tequila in a blender. Blend.

Janenne on breathing: Easier. The swank, leather-drenched, 21st-floor nook (is that Spokane I see out the window?) used to be a premiere cigar bar until lawmakers decided two years ago that smoking and lungs in public could no longer commingle. It’s a good change, according to Janenne’s bronchi: “When you worked in that environment every day, you didn’t realize the effect it had on you until later.”

On mingling: With celebrities like Steven Spielberg and notable local software tycoons frequently sipping in the finely upholstered shadows, please, please—be cool. “You won’t last long in here if you start asking them too many questions or being obnoxious.”

Putting my tab to shame: Vintage Lounge is known to host Seahawks rookie night, where the team’s unspoken game plan is to vacuum its way through at least $12,000 of meat and alcohol. Guess who gets stuck with the bill? Welcome to Seattle, sucker.