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Chaos 02/13/2011 5:06:00 AM
Awesome! It feels really good to hear some people who think along the same lines as me in regards to this type of stuff. I was recently involved in a scenario where my boyfriend and I were in the car on our way to do some errands and started arguing about something that we were able to get over within a few hours or so, but at the time it was getting very heated because he has an anger problem and i have a pretty serious case of bipolar 2. i ended up telling him to leave the car because i felt he was being really rude and it was just getting too irritating, he grabbed my shoulder to pull me towards him after i pulled over because he wanted me to know he really meant what he said and asked me why we were having such an interaction on Christmas Eve. then all of a sudden this guy comes running at my car yelling at him "Get out of the car, I'm going to beat your ass!" and then the next thing i know when i get off work I'm being pulled over and questioned about him "choking" me. Apparently that guy had filed a police report. Now I am legally not allowed to see my boyfriend, he has "Attempted Strangulation" charges pending on him, I will be putting in my second motion this week for the no contact order to be dropped, not out of fear, (let it be known that I hold my own, don't have any kids, and handle my own finances just fine and he would NEVER threaten me in any way especially with death), but out of the fact that this situation just got blown out of proportion, the wrong people saw things from a completely different car from mine going the opposite direction and decided to butt in for whatever reason or because they thought it would be fun to play the lowlife-trying-to-look-like-a-good-guy game. The only reason why any attention could have been drawn to our car was that we were both yelling really loud at each other, the window was probably cracked and it was a very emotional dispute. Now i've had to go without my New Years' 2011 kiss and will be having an extremely lonely Valentines Day. I love him very much and turn up my nose at any other guy.
So to the people who agree with this article, thank you. It sure helps to know that people know what i am going through and dont just think I'm some pathetic victim with no self-esteem. I work a full-time job, go to school for graphic design, and am a passionate fire dancer and snowboarder. And i really am not scared of my boyfriend. I love him more than you could ever imagine. So it really helps to know that some people are in their right minds and know what I'm going through right now. I pray every night that my voice is somehow heard.
To the people who still think that the justice system does the right thing, think again. People aren't all the same, so obviously not all domestic violence cases are the same. I am NOT the pathetic victim with no self-esteem you're probably thinking i am and I feel very insulted that some people are so ignorant as to automatically think that every report of domestic violence is reported correctly. This gives law enforcement, at least here in Idaho, a lot of room to get away with lying and a lot of room for relationships to be completely turned upside down rather than put in a place where problems can be addressed and situations can be improved. I hope you can learn to be a bit less ignorant and realize that people do lie a lot in these types of situations and you have to be aware of that.
Thank you,
~Chaos.
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Chaos 02/13/2011 4:28:00 AM
but there are certain situations where the desire to stay with the so-called "abuser" does NOT INVOLVE FEAR, but sheer love for that person. have you ever thought that maybe people blow things out of proportion and use this law to screw somebody else over for their own personal benefit? maybe not your usual cookie cutter scenario but these situations do happen.
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Niki 12/29/2007 6:26:00 PM
Interesting read, interesting law. I agree it's a societal problem 100 %, but there's a lot of potential for misuse. Where are the neighbors, family, and social workers hiding? :) Why are victims calling 911 and not a domestic violence hotline? I suppose telling callers there'll be fraud fines for misuse of state services would be proper as a warning.
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H. Williams 11/09/2007 12:55:00 AM
I appreciated reading the article �How the Cops Turn Abused Spouses into Voiceless Victims,� though I continue to be discouraged by the state of domestic violence policy in this country. As the article points out, the state has to walk a very fine line between protecting the community and the victim from an abuser while not perpetuating the cycle of abuse by stripping the victim of his/her voice and power. The state has a responsibility to protect its citizens and when the police are called on a domestic violence matter, it is the job of the police to intervene and protect the victim. I understand that the victim needs to be empowered, but I also think that the victim doesn�t always know what is in his/her best interest. Domestic violence involves a significant amount of fear and it is this fear that persuades a victim to stay with the abuser. Financial fear, legal fear, immigration fear, social fear. Of course this is wrapped up in power, but fear plays a significant role. In the case of the woman in the article, Andrea Rich-Bell, she doesn�t know how she is going to support her children if her husband is in jail. The problem is that she probably doesn�t see any other alternatives. But there are alternatives. And once the police arrest the abuser and the no contact order is put into place, it is her responsibility to find these alternatives. I know I am na� and that life isn�t black and white, but I just can�t find a rationalization for abuse. The police shouldn�t have to walk this tightrope, because domestic violence shouldn�t exist. Maybe the push from the police to take a step towards a life free from abuse is exactly what the victim needs.
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cw 11/08/2007 2:30:00 AM
Good job--but it's only half-way done! You forgot to show readers what happens when any of these folks applies for housing or a job ever again. :
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Happened 11/02/2007 11:49:00 PM
Let's not forget about the main reasons for DV charges.
1. When a woman finds a new partner and wants her current partner out of the picture... DV is the way to get rid of him and get her freak on
2. When a woman finds out her current partner is cheating... DV is the way for her to get revenge and make sure the other woman can't have him either
That's not always the case but I know of a case that a guy was charged with DV before the officers even saw the victim. The guy was in his garage bleeding from fingernail scratches... they officer told him, she was probably trying to get you off of her. Then he went to see her and eventhough she didn't even have as much as a wrinkled shirt... guess what would look better on the police report, guess who went to jail... you guessed right. Poor fella.
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Pete 11/02/2007 8:19:00 AM
Frankly, this is another example of the nanny state government we have come to accept (unfortunately). We tell private businesses that they can't allow smoking. We tell "victims" that they are victims, and the state is their protector - whether they want it or not - and they have no say in the matter.
There are few rights more sacrosanct than freedom of association. These automatic no-contact orders based on merely probable cause of a crime, and even against the victim's wishes, result in a loss of that right of free association.
The law is always about balance. As always, the pendulum swings too far BOTH ways, and has currently swung to the extent where the state feels obligated, as noted due to pressure by women's groups etc., to tell people who they can and can't associate with. DV crimes are also about the only misdemeanor crimes where the state often goes forward against the victim's wishes.
I don't frequently come down on the side of defense attorneys, but they are spot on in their analysis of this problem.
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Roger Knight 11/02/2007 1:45:00 AM
A very good article by Nina. She tells it like it is.
The problem with the no-contact orders is they force the immediate breakup of families and render impossible the communications necessary to allow a reconciliation. We talk about the number of children being raised without their fathers, and how these numbers for the black community are catastrophic. These numbers result from numerous deliberate policy decisions DESIGNED to breakup families and increase the welfare state, the child support state, and the criminal justice system. If a cop tells you that crime does not pay, you can reply that it pays him.
Most DV situations are one time blow-ups or two way streets, and in many cases are woman initiated. Sometimes the woman who tires of her marriage engineers the DV and will falsely exaggerate the incident or make it up. However, the system is designed to reward the female perjurer. Many protection order cases are dismissed once the house and custody of the children are secured for the divorce battle.
In most cases, however angry either party is, they are not about to murder each other. Mandatory arrest policies are blatantly unconstitutional in that they require police officers who honestly believe they do not have probable cause that a crime has been committed to arrest at least one party in a domestic call.
It is usually the man, even if he is the one who is bleeding.
Perhaps some restoration of the Constitution is a good idea in this field of law.
Suggestion, you might want to look into the case of Lamont Jackson, a child support enforcement tech who has been charged with domestic violance crimes, including Assault 2 DV strangulation. King County Superior Court No. 07-1-06709-1 SEA. No evidence is yet presented in that file that Mrs. Jackson has EVER sought medical attention for strangulation. Without such evidence, the jury could rationally acquit on the Assault 2 charge in compliance with the lack of evidence part of the reasonable doubt instruction.
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Janet 11/01/2007 5:25:00 AM
I'm not getting it either. Six kids, one income brought home (what's left after he buys his dope) by a guy that freaks out cuz he loses drugs on the bus. Fighting in public on a downtown street...and they are havin' another. I hate to say it, but it's hard to have sympathy for her or the father. Let's hope their other kids make something of themselves.
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Sally Neary 11/01/2007 1:04:00 AM
Here's hoping that a prison term will keep Roy Rich-Bell from knocking up his young wife for the eighth time. It seems that nothing else will.