Horoscopes

Scorpio (Oct. 23-Nov. 21)

Your soul is an archipelago. Different facets of your personality have diverged so completely, it's as if they live on separate islands, and the transitions between them are more difficult and time- consuming than they used to be (and are fraught with vicious sea monsters and perilous storms that blow you off course). You don't want all your different selves to become so alike that they can live on the same island, however; it's important to preserve your versatility and variety. But please build bridges between islandsimprove your ability to switch between your various aspects swiftly. Otherwise, you'll kick yourself if you miss your goal because you got stuck wearing the wrong hat at the wrong time.

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Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21)

It's been a long time since you truly believed your old philosophy, "If I can think it, I can do it," but it's no less valid than when you espoused it wholeheartedly. In fact, in most ways you're more capable of realizing your most ambitious dreams than you were before. So why spend all this time doubting yourself? Count yourself lucky enough to have dreams and ambitions. Many people have no clue what to do with themselves. Don't squander your blessings: inspiration and aspiration. Honor those this week, and either go for your dream or forget about it.

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Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19)

Victorians came about as a reaction to the relative decadence of the generation that preceded them. They advocated rigid propriety and extreme civility as a desperate sort of answer to the depravity they perceived. You Capricorns are bad about this. Name a Cap kid Moonbeam and give him acid at age 13, and he'll be a Republican corporate CEO in 20 years. Please be careful about that kind of knee-jerk reaction, where you end up embracing the opposite extreme of whatever situation you've been forced into. Transcend that trend, Cap, because even the shittiest events of your last few months have had some good parts that you'd miss out on if you just did an about-face and ran.

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Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18)

Writing is distilled thought. Reading what someone has written is the closest you'll get to hearing their thoughts, albeit condensed, purified, and refined. Think about it. Trying to speak your mind sometimes turns out wrong, and you end up saying things you really didn't mean. But you're far less likely to write them. Writing is one sure path to a more profound truth of what you think and who you are. Do you see where I'm going with this? You're working very hard to put out into the world a very deep truth that you've been thinking about for a long time. Even if it's something you'd rather say or paint or film than have people read, write it down first anywayso you can be sure to get it exactly right.

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Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20)

Many people see only two possible paths through any given situation: conformity or rebellion. But that viewpoint is simple-minded and only for those who can't cope with ambiguity or contradiction. You're too complicated (and distracted) to pursue a linear path toward your dreams. Your course to your destination is meandering, to understate things. So what? Take the gorgeously circuitous route you prefer, without feeling like you have to cleave to some straight and narrow path. Most of the tangential side trips you end up going on (with a few notable exceptions) are more than worth the delay. Don't sweat it. As long as you know you're going to get there eventually, and as long as you keep moving, you'll be just fine.

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Aries (March 21-April 19)

By the end of this week, you should be more exhausted thanas my Texan roommate would saya two-dollar whore on nickel night. Luckily, you'll have a lot more funit's just the kind of fun you'll really have to work for. So? You've been slaving away for a month or three now for a lot less than a great timejust crap like rent money and new shoes. Now that the carrot dangling in front of you is less obviously a necessity, but way more enjoyable, you should work even harder for it.

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Taurus (April 20-May 20)

The Tiger Lillies require a sort of advanced sense of humor from their audience. It's not so much that they're excessively clever but that they've transmuted the essential darkness of life and death into humorous takes on sacrilege or morbidity (a sample lyric from one of their cheerier songs goes: "I am crucifying Jesus/And banging in the nails/Banging banging banging banging banging in the nails!"). The kind of people who find this funny have graduated from knock-knock jokes and been around the block a few times since then. Whether you're one of those people or not, I think you get the gist, anywaylet your cynicism make you laugh this week, not cry.

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Gemini (May 21-June 20)