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Second place: Castle Superstore (various locations)

Best Place to Rent Porn

BLUE VIDEO

Carmelita
Robin Laananen
Carmelita

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(4100 Aurora N., 632-9886)

Usually when we think of blue video, we think of malfunctioning VCRs. But on Aurora, "blue" still means getting your bone on, and it's home to the Wal-Mart of porn. They've got the latest stuff, of course, but also the classics—if observing the fashion, hair, and makeup disasters of your parents' time gets you off, you'll be in heaven. The '90s saw an explosive growth in the porn market and, with it, extremely narrow genres—how would you like your she-males? If the hysterical anti-porn activists were right, then the staff (who see more action on-screen in a week than most of us see in a year) ought to be drooling Neanderthals too busy raping kids to offer quality customer service. Yet they're articulate, friendly-but-not-too-friendly, and discreet—thus striking a blow for First Amendment rights. R.L.

Second place: (the mysterious) R 'n' R (210 106th Pl. N.E., Bellevue, 425-453-5683)

Best Strip Club

RICK'S

(11332 Lake City Way N.E., 362-4458)

Every now and then we need to shut up, sit down, and pay mysterious naked ladies to dance for us, at us, or on us, and Rick's is the place to make it so. A little NC-17 touch of Casablanca in Lake City, but no Bogart, no Bergman, no Nazis or corrupt French officials—this is Lake City, people. Glamour and noir can't be bothered to drive out to the semiburbs. Fine by us—who wants to see Fatima the Intifi-darling shake it to As Time Goes By when there's a perfectly serviceable Rock the Casbah available? Why not celebrate post-feminism (or pre-feminism) in unabashed low-rent style? Open pretty late (2:30 every night); exit visas cost extra. Here's looking at you, kid. R.L.

Second place: Lusty Lady (1315 First, 622-9182)

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