I wanna bite the hand that feeds me

PISSED OFF about half-assed reporting or wack opinions? Firing off a letter to the editor is all well and good, but why tap your missive on a PC when you can bang it out with power chords? Musicians have been taking their beefs with writers and editors, sometimes by name, straight to wax for years. The latest to lodge a complaint is Amy Ray, who—backed by the Butchies—fries a well-known editor and publisher for giving the shaft to female artists. Here, then, is a raft of rebukes from some of rock's, punk's, and hip-hop's finest.

AMY RAY, "Lucystoners" (2001): Solo Indigo writes off future cover appearances to make point about equal access. Key lyric: "Janny Wenner, Janny Wenner, Rolling Stone's most fearless leader/Gave the boys what they deserve, but with the girls he lost his nerve."

MR. T EXPERIENCE, "I Wrote a Book About Rock and Roll" (1999): No names here, which means the pop-punk ditty could be about almost any scribe in this self-inflated profession. Key lyric: "I know words like 'sobriquet,' 'malaise,' and 'plutocrat'/And I compare the Shaggs to Wittgenstein—how cool is that?"

METHOD MAN, KRS-ONE, PRODIGY, KAM, "Bulworth (They Talk About It While We Live It)" (1998): Blastmaster KRS licks shots at Rolling Stone, Details, Spin, and the Source for a dearth of color in the editorial room. Key lyric: "Every time I do an interview in Rolling Stone/They sendin' me a writer that look like he's Home Alone/Ignorant to the culture and the microphone."

BIKINI KILL, "Hamster Baby" (1993): Riot Grrrls serve notice to then-Melody Maker tastemaker that they don't need his stinkin' fawning. Key lyric: "Oh, Everett True, where are you?!"

GUNS N' ROSES, "Get in the Ring" (1991): In which Axl Rose goes off on everyone in sight (you were expecting?) for alleged inaccuracies. Key lyric: "And that goes for all you punks in the press that want to start shit by printin' lies/Instead of the things we said/That means you, Andy Secher at Hit Parader, Circus Magazine, Mick Wall at Kerrang!, Bob Guccione Jr. at Spin/What? You pissed off 'cause your dad gets more pussy than you?"

FUGAZI, "Song #1" (1990): Principled punks stick up for all the Joe Schmoes by aiming, presumably, at Maximumrocknroll and narrow-minded 'zine writers everywhere. Key lyric: "Everybody's talking about their hometown scenes and hurting people's feelings in their magazines/ You wanna know what it all means? It's nothing."

SONIC YOUTH, "Kill Yr. Idols" (1983): Avant-garde's artiest band cut down Village Voice dean Robert Christgau to make way for fresh heroes. Original title: "I Killed Christgau with My Big Fuckin' Dick." Key lyric: "I don't know why you wanna impress Christgau/Ahh, let that shit die and find out the new goal."

CHRIS NELSON

info@seattleweekly.com

The Metro Gnome will return next week.

 
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